Tempering Temper

I'm almost always a calm and collected person. Or at least I think I am. Yet on rare occasions, when I least expect it, some set of circumstances, emotions, or harsh words will override my calm capacity and spark a momentary surge of temper. 'Ever happen to you?

For instance, I remember a business meeting where I once felt that one individual was chopping down every idea I suggested - often before I'd finished explaining it. After a few rounds of interruptions, I retorted: "Well, if you'd let me complete an idea, it might not be as bad as you think." The tone of my remark put a hush on the meeting. Embarrassed by my response, I resolved to stay quite during the rest of the meeting. The other person didn't say much either. Actually I felt really bad about barking at that person, who probably didn't even realize they were cutting me off.

A day or two later I got up the courage to give this person a call. We both apologized and agreed that temper had gotten the best of us. Our moment of mutual contrition became a quiet pact of mutual respect. In subsequent meetings we became better listeners, especially to each other, and often supportive of each other's ideas.

Over the years I've learned a lot about tempering, and even eliminating temper or anger in my thoughts and words. It can be done! One of my favorite spirituality writers Mary Baker Eddy states this point simply: "The good in human affection must have ascendancy over the evil, or happiness will never be won. (Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures)"

Over the years, I think I've gained much greater control over temper and anger by cultivating the good in my human affection so it can have ascendancy over any tendency to fight evil with evil. It's like putting on a hate-proof armor when I strive to see the innate goodness in myself and others - all others. I like to think of unselfish goodness as the normal disposition of all of God's children. Striving to view others this way has, many times, prevented me from being irked by harsh words, or even malicious acts. Because siding with unconditional goodness overrides the human nature to react.

This type of approach is summed up by the profound truth, known as the Golden Rule, expressed in many beliefs and moral traditions: "Do undo others, as you would have them do unto you." Following this promotes the ascendancy of goodness. It quells temper, cools the hot buttons of hatred or revenge, and brings dominion and peace to our lives.

About The Author

John Minard has been a spiritual healer for twenty years and has a practice in the Philadelphia/New Jersey area. Using the prayer-based system, as explained in Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures, by Mary Baker Eddy, John helps others find healing, spiritual value, and well being for physical, mental, emotional, relationship, and financial problems. He can be reached at johnminard@mail.com for more information on Science and Health visit http://www.spirituality.com.

---

How to Deal Effectively with Anxiety

Every human feels anxiety on occasion; it is a part... Read More

How to Create Your Ideal Life - Excerpt from Individual Power

When I lost it all, I felt powerless. During my... Read More

Reduce Anxiety About Decison Making

What's the alternative to making decisions?Allowing someone else, or circumstances,... Read More

Managing Your Perfectionism

What Is Perfectionism?This is the first of two newsletters that... Read More

Make Your Life Easier?

'Have you read the Art of War?' someone asked me... Read More

3 Easy Steps to Low Stress Communication

Life is all about choices. And so is the way... Read More

Just Listen, Please!

When did you last do that? When did you last... Read More

Business Career, Executive Coaching Article - Leadership: Understanding the Human Condition

"Nothing is more practical than for people to deepen themselves.... Read More

The Magic of Hearing

I'm working on a coach training certification, and one of... Read More

Do You Make Less Money Than Your Taller Peers?

A recent study at the University of Florida found that... Read More

What The Buddha Says About Coaches

There is a Buddhist saying that goes like this: "If... Read More

What Is A Personal Trainer

Imagine stepping into the gym for the first time in... Read More

Why Bosses Dont Get All the News

Not long ago, a friend who works in television complained... Read More

So Why Are They Really Here?

It does make you wonder sometimes, doesn't it? You know... Read More

The Secret of Self-Esteem

Have you ever thought about what really creates self-esteem? Having... Read More

Be Better at Business ? And Lose Weight, Too!

In business, individuals often secure the services of a success... Read More

Walt Disney, the Inspiration to Form a Better Life?

You, like many others, may have come to this article... Read More

Transform Your Image And Accelerate Your Success

Being a lifelong student, I am regularly attending seminars etc.... Read More

Embracing Excellence

Joey rises before dawn to pack his lunch, eager for... Read More

You Are Never Trapped!

"The meaning of life is that it stops." -Franz Kafka... Read More

The Self Development Tool Box

Do you have a self-development toolbox? Do you have a... Read More

Do You Really Need A Home Business Mentor?

Having a mentor can mean the difference between success and... Read More

Coaching Can Help Teachers At A Crossroads In Their Careers

Teachers enter the profession with the desire to help others,... Read More

How to be Your Authentic Self

Most of us play many different roles in the course... Read More

How to Turn Around A Sinking Conversation - 7 Tips

When a conversation is not working out there is the... Read More

Are You At The Point Of No Return?

There is a point at which everything becomes simple and... Read More

The Good, The Bad and The Ugly: How Do You Change the World?

Recently, I saw an exhibition of paintings by a very... Read More

How Stella (Laurie) Got Her Groove Back!

Being a Life Strategy Coach doesn't mean I'm always on... Read More

Assertive Communication: 20 Helpful Tips

Most of us know that assertiveness will get you further... Read More

Coaching Employees - The Chronic Excuser

Most of us find coaching employees to be an effective,... Read More

Is Your Life In Motion?

Ever since the Internet bubble and the 9/11 terrorist attacks,... Read More

Secrets of Creating Interpersonal Power

If you work with people, as a company owner, manager... Read More

Are You Addicted To Your Activities?

Activities - such as sports, creative projects, reading, work, TV,... Read More