Unemployment Survival: Taking Back Control

One of the most emotionally crippling aspects of unemployment is the sense of powerlessness it engenders. Job layoff triggers financial pressures, emotional distress, family turmoil, and dashed career hopes. It is forced on us by unrelenting fate, an emotionally disengaged employer, and economic currents that have little to do with us personally. We feel that we have no control over our situation, our lives, our future.

As we work through the anger, resentment, depression, and fear which is the common lot of the jobless, we can take some steps to regain our balance, reclaim a positive focus, and reassert personal control.

1. Daily Routine.

We no longer have the structure of work to mold our days and give meaning to our leisure time. In a very short period of time, we start to drift. Our days are so much the same that we no longer remember what day of the week it is. The line between work and relaxation blurs. We don't work hard enough at our job search so we feel guilty which spoils our play time. Nothing has to be done immediately so we put it all off until tomorrow. Take back control by designing, and maintaining, your own schedule. Get up at the same time each morning, shower and get dressed as if you are going to work. Map out your job hunting activities and stick to the plan. Build in relaxation periods and stick to those too. Having a regular routine, and a defined purpose (finding work) helps you to continue to think of yourself as a worker and a valuable, productive individual, both critical in avoiding the descent into social oblivion prolonged unemployment so often brings.

2. Physical Shape.

We eat when we are anxious. We eat when we are depressed. We eat when we are upset. Couple these psychological urges to eat with the fact that we no longer appear before coworkers' eyes each day, have nothing to dress up for, and have seriously impaired self-respect, and our weight balloons out of control. Fight back by returning to a regimen of regular, healthful eating. So much of our lives is out of our control right now that it is a relief to find one area where we are in sole command. Cherish that opportunity by eating sparingly, reducing the amount of time spent in the kitchen, finding non-edible outlets for stress relief. At the same time, start a limited but regular exercise routine. It may not be something you enjoy but at last you have the time to do it and all that huffing and puffing is a wonderful way to temporarily banish your worries.

3. Personal Relations.

You don't really feel like socializing. You are so tense and on edge that you take it out on those closest to you: your family. Make the effort to compartmentalize your life between your career strains and that of your family and friends. If you allow the frustrations of the one to spill over into the other, you are poisoning your best source of needed support and heading towards the personal disaster -estrangement, divorce, violence - that too frequently accompanies extended unemployment and the wide-ranging destructiveness it spawns.

4. Job Search.

We have no control over when we receive a call for an interview or get that job offer we want so much. What we can control is where we spend our valuable energy. Submitting resumes for openings advertised in the classifieds or on line should be a very minor part of our job search. For every position listed, hundreds of resumes may be submitted. Do the math and it is revealed as similar to buying a lottery ticket - easy and fun to do but unlikely to change your future. Spend your time more wisely by networking with everyone you know (and everyone they know) and calling on employers in your industry to identify openings which have not yet been publicized. Your sense of control arises out of being proactive: putting yourself in the public eye, refusing to passively sit by the telephone awaiting the call which never comes. You may be exhausted at the end of the day, and frustrated if the negative reactions held no hint of possibility, but you do have the self-satisfaction of knowing that you have taken your fate into your own hands and will no longer be relegated to the ranks of those who simply "watch and wait."

5. Community Activities.

You may be relatively inactive in local events or deeply committed to your community. In either case, now is the time to intensify your level of activity. Since you can only productively job search for a limited number of hours per week, use the additional time to become connected. Volunteer for local charities, schools, union halls, hospitals, any communal events you can find. You control where you invest your time and efforts and being productive, even in a small way, can help repair your shattered self-esteem. Interacting with other volunteers is also a whole new opportunity for networking and may indirectly lead to that one golden opportunity you seek.

The world of unemployment, especially if prolonged, can be emotional debilitating. By reasserting control over some aspects of our lives, we can contain the damage inflicted on our psyche and face the future proudly, recognizing that job loss is a regrettable fact of life, not a personal failure.

Virginia Bola operated a rehabilitation company for 20 years, developing innovative job search techniques for disabled workers, while serving as a respected Vocational Expert in Administrative, Civil and Workers' Compensation Courts. Author of an interactive and emotionally supportive workbook, The Wolf at the Door: An Unemployment Survival Manual, and a monthly ezine, The Worker's Edge, she can be reached at http://www.virginiabola.com

---

3 Questions No Job Seeker Ever Wants To Be Asked?

Employer and interviewers expect you to answer tough question during... Read More

Age Discrimination is Alive and Unwelcome Here!

Common sense appears to be a rare commodity these days.... Read More

How to Improve Your Work Situation

buWhy are so many people unhappy in their work situation?... Read More

Dressing Tips for Interview Success

Dressing appropriately for job interviews is one of those areas... Read More

Networking - A Key Factor in a Successful Job Search

In today's economy, job seekers need an edge beyond their... Read More

Free Resume Template: The ONLY One Youll Ever Need

WARNING: This article is likely to make you mad.In fact,... Read More

Tell Me About Yourself

The need to tell people about yourself may present itself... Read More

Nine Ways to Tell Youre Ready for a Promotion

So you noticed the new job board posting on your... Read More

Cross Cultural Interviews

At this moment in time, the increase in cross border... Read More

How to Make Your Career Change Easier

Despite what your grandmother told you, life is not supposed... Read More

Seven Ways to Stand Out in a Sea of Applicants

Is your résumé getting lost in a flood of résumés?... Read More

Just a Series of Choices

Steve's a pretty regular guy ? wife, 4 kids in... Read More

What Recruiters Hate About Resumes And Cover Letters

Today, I'm going to share with you the awful truth... Read More

The Background on Background Checks

In one of my past lives I held a Top... Read More

Get A New Job - Career Choices

Career change is tough but rewardingThere are a number of... Read More

Resume Tune Up

Employers have fears, uncertainty and DOUBT (the FUD factor) over... Read More

How to Ask For a Salary Increase and Get Your Raise

Feeling overworked and underpaid? If you're starting to feel like... Read More

Thank-You Notes: An Integral Part of Your Career Design

There is one little practice that is vital to generating... Read More

Telecommuting Website (Part One)

"I've heard you talk about building a website to get... Read More

Learn Some Useful Feng Shui Career Tips

As it does with every main life aspect, feng shui... Read More

Changing Careers? How to Get Around the Three Major Mental Roadblocks to Success

A part of you can't wait to dive into your... Read More

Job Interviews -- The Real Reasons Why You Need to Follow Up

Effective follow-up after a job interview is often a key... Read More

Career Change: From Suits & Sales to Boots & Rails

Peter Humleker had it made. As the general manager of... Read More

Nonverbal Interview Behavior

Non-verbal interview behavior can drown out your verbal self-presentation.Practice interviewing... Read More

3 Resume Secrets the Pros Use

You don't write a resume every day. Not even every... Read More

Are You a Nice Person? What Companies are Looking for in Recruiting and Retaining Great People

Hal Rosenbluth, author of The Customer Comes Second, states; "In... Read More

Turning Their Loss Into Your Job Gain

It isn't the end of the world, even if it... Read More

Are You Tired of Hiring Other Peoples Rejects? - 12 Mistakes Recruiters Make and How To Avoid Them

When John applied for a job at Oakland Company, his... Read More

How To Write The Perfect Cover Letter: Be Brief--And Be Gone!

The best cover letters are 'one-page wonders.' Why? Because they... Read More

Your Resume Format - What Is The First Thing You Need To Do?

The first thing you need to do before you write... Read More

Ten Resume Writing Tips You Can?t Live Without

For some job opening, employers receive hundreds and even thousands... Read More

A Concept That Could Double Youre Income in Mystery Shopping

Do you want to double, or increase significantly you're income... Read More

Wake Up and Learn Something New

The US Government has just released last month's job creation... Read More