Writers can Grow to be Comfortable with Criticism

On my first newspaper assignment as a critic, I was well prepared to dish it out. I was less prepared to take it. Imagine my surprise when my witty, well-crafted critique drew a smattering of letters filled with name-calling and nasty words. It stung. Could the critic handle criticism? I discovered that with some emotional discipline and introspection, I could not only handle criticism, I could grow from it. Here's how.

Allow yourself to feel hurt--briefly. It's natural to be shocked and hurt by criticism. Recognize it, feel it but don't allow yourself to wallow in it. Knowing you have a technique for dealing with criticism allows you to put the breaks on hurt feelings as you move on to the next step.

Consider the source. All critics can be divided into three categories. The critic can be a crank, someone that lives in pain and feels the need to spread it around. The critic can be a self-appointed expert. Such people feel they have a duty to point out other people's shortcomings. Or the critic can be a mentor, someone whose thoughtful, objective opinion can help you improve your performance.

Deal with it. If your critic is a crank, recognize that such people attack anyone or anything that draws their attention. Say a prayer for them as you put their remarks through your mental paper shredder. If your critic is a self-appointed expert, consider their motivation. Does it seem they honestly want to help you improve? Or is their purpose to disparage you so they can feel superior? In either case, their criticism may hold a grain of truth. Be open to looking for it. But if you sense your critic needs to drag you down so they can lift themselves up, raise your emotional barriers. Consider any aspect of their criticism that seems valid, but don't allow them to shake your sense of self-worth. Hopefully, your critic is the third type, a mentor, someone whose opinion you can respect. Their criticism is well thought-out and deserves your serious attention. Consider what they say and see if it offers you an opportunity to improve an actual flaw.

Move on. Take what valid points you can from your critic. Decide whether or not you want to use the criticism as an opportunity for self-improvement, then move on. If you find yourself dwelling on criticism, allowing it to drain your energy and confidence, shut the door on it. Visualize your critic, or their letter, framed in a doorway. Imagine yourself shutting the door with a satisfying slam, hearing the click of the lock and walking away. See the door getting smaller and smaller until it disappears in the past. This signals your self on many different levels that you're closing the door on the event and moving on.

Writers of any kind will always be met with criticism. You don't have to like it, but you can refuse to be wounded by it. Learning to handle criticism in a calm and self-confident spirit will help you grow as a writer and as a person.

BONNIE BOOTS (http://www.BonnieBoots.com)is an award-winning writer and designer who says all writers should show off their talent by wearing their Write Side Out! Her wise and witty product line of gear that shows the world you're a writer is at http://www.writesideout.com

---

The Writer and the Web

If your dream is to get published, the chance is... Read More

What You May Not Learn In College... (Part Two)

If you become a writer for any publication, private business,... Read More

How To Stay Fit While Writing

Day after day, writers tend to sit for hours writing... Read More

Write a Letter, Make a Difference

Today I took the dog for a walk and realized... Read More

Scenes and Structure

Beginning writers often tend to think of a book as... Read More

How to Avoid the 11 Biggest Mistakes of First Time Authors

"If you want to change your life," Harry Beckwith wrote... Read More

The Myths of Writing: Have You Bought Into These?

There is an image most people carry of the artist... Read More

The Dreaded Daily Word Count

Open any book on 'how to write,' and somewhere you... Read More

Turbo-Charging Your Writing Career - 6 High-Yield Strategies

Hands up all those who'd like to have a successful... Read More

How to Publish a Book: Key Differences Between Publishing and Self Publishing

For many authors just starting out, it can be a... Read More

Ten Ways to Get Cheap (and Free) Magazine Samples

1 - Join a reading or writing group. Ask members... Read More

Vital Verbs

Remember back in the dark days of your school years... Read More

The Power of Punctuation

Punctuation, when used creatively, is powerful. Note, however, that when... Read More

Review In 29 Steps Plus One

I just finished to read a book. A story for... Read More

Can Your Theme Be Proved In Your Story?

Creative Writing Tips ?Your theme has to be something you... Read More

10 Things that Keep You from Writing Your Book? and What You Can do About It

9 out of 10 professionals and small business owners have... Read More

Alternative View Points and the Lamp of Creativity

Pictures they say are worth a thousand words, but many... Read More

8 Great Journaling Tips

Mix a martini, don't forget the olives, or pour yourself... Read More

Celebrating Writing and Life

Every morning I excitedly get out of bed. Just a... Read More

Top Ten Ways to Write Like a Pro Checklist

Sure you can write, but can you write crisp, compelling... Read More

Business Writing Tip: Question & Answer Format

Traditionally, business writing uses the "one thing after another" format,... Read More

Finish Your Book Already!

I owe the completion and success of my book to... Read More

How To Write Cover Letters That Work

Sometimes there is confusion about the exact meaning of the... Read More

Why I Write

I started writing as a way of keeping safe memories... Read More

Passionate About Writing?

I'm a writing fool! 2 book proposals, 1 user's guide,... Read More

7 Ways to Turn Readers Into Friends

Back in my school days, if the teacher demanded a... Read More

Effective Editing: It Spells the Difference!

If you think proofreading equals editing, then you're wrong! Editing... Read More

Creative Writing

Do you consider yourself a storyteller? Do you consider yourself... Read More

8 Tips to Get Publishers to Notice You

If your articles aren't getting published very often, or you... Read More

Imagine The Imagination

Imagine a three hundred page book was in the author's... Read More

Creative Writing Tips - Does The Name You Chose Suit Your Character?

How do you choose a name? Do you put down... Read More

Book Publishing Contracts For Writers: What Should I Look Out For?

Dave, I just got a contract for a book... Read More

Planning Time To Write

In his book, "Achieving Financial Independence as a Freelance Writer,"... Read More