Achieve the Success You Want: 7 Reasons Why People Dont

Change is one of the biggest concepts facing today's society. We are all confronted by how fast the world is changing and how we must change to keep up. We should view change as exciting!

What is the process we need to understand when seeking to change our behaviour? What are the prerequisites to lasting change? Most people don't do what they want to do and do what they don't want to do. Why is this? Why is change so hard for many?

1. We Are Not Clear On Where We Are Heading

A goal is imperative to where you want to go, but how many of us have a clearly defined statement for our life, know our values, or have any goals written down?

We can do this by writing a future letter, a personal mission statement, or merely by placing a list of goals in a visible place. This will help us decide where we want to end up. If we aim at nothing, we will more than likely achieve nothing!

It is also important to ensure each goal is chosen for the right reasons. Each reason must be a compelling reason for us. For example, if we do things to please others, or because we feel we should, we will often give up later on down the track, or not have the passion to complete the goal. Finding the right reasons will often require an understanding of our values and beliefs and priorities.

2. Our Attitude Is Wrong

The right attitude is crucial for change to be a positive experience. We must see change as something that we want, that is exciting and which will provide us with new possibilities. The power of positive thinking has been examined in great depth in many books. A list of good books to help you understand how to tap into this power of positive thinking for yourself can be found on the resources page of my website: http://www.aspectcoaching.com/Resources.html

3. We Don't Know How To Renew The Mind

This means learning to look at things from a new perspective. Perspective is how we personally see things. With a new perspective change is easy. Achieving change with a non-empowering perspective is hard.

Some negative perspectives are doubt, fear, blame, criticism, low self-esteem and judgement.

Some empowering perspectives are trust, positive thinking, respect, commitment and responsibility.

Changing our perspective involves considering how we may look at things differently. It sometimes helps to consider how an outsider would view our circumstances.

Affirmations are one effective way to renew the mind. They can keep the mind focused on our goal if they are referred to regularly. Affirmations need to be written in the present tense, in the first person and with strong, positive language stating what you want to achieve, not what you don't. For example, 'I find it so easy to network with people.'

4. We Don't Form New Habits

Habits are one of the main factors that influence how we behave. To change a habit we must act on something at least seven times to reinforce the changed behaviour. Understanding the process of reinforcing habits can make a big difference. Some of these are:

• Getting a support system to put a new habit in place
• Getting a reminder system
• Making appointments with yourself
• Changing thinking patterns

5. We Don't Understand Or Master The Areas Needed For Change

With all the desire in the world, we cannot change without the right tools. Tools provide us with the framework to make a difference. Some of the tools may be:

• Overcoming fear
• Overcoming obstacles
• Knowing where to change
• Having an empowering vision
• Keeping the momentum
• Drawing on the resources of others
• Recognizing our own limiting beliefs
• Aligning change to our values
• Designing a motivating environment

6. We Do Not Get Enough Support From Others

We are all designed to be in community. We are all imperfect, so we have to depend on the strengths of others to compliment our weaknesses. Getting support from people such as a coach, mentor or mastermind group is crucial to successful change. Coaching is a powerful process that enables a person to clarify what they want and the necessary steps to get there. Coaching allows for accountability, support, encouragement, feedback and challenge. These are all things we cannot get alone.

How many Olympic medallists would have won a medal without a coach?

7. We Stop Before The Change Has Happened

This is the biggest obstacle to change. Many people start off well but do not complete the race. Perseverance is the key. Keeping our eyes on the goal and not losing heart are crucial for success. Remembering what was driving us initially, and recapturing that vision can help keep us from giving up. Evaluation is important to recognize ways that have been successful and those that need changing.

A Model for Change

One of the most well respected models for change is the GROW principle. This is as follows:

• Goal Setting
: Clarifying the goal, breaking it down into manageable steps.
• Reality
: Considering where you are now, what is the gap to achieving the change, and what resources you can tap into.
• Options
: Considering the different options to reach your goal.
• Way forward
: Deciding on an action plan and sticking to it; celebrating success; and adjusting the plan as necessary.

A personal coach can take you through a model to facilitate change. The questions below may also help you move forward.

Personal Coaching Questions:

Name one area you would like to change.

Do you know where you are heading?

Is there any way your attitude needs changing?

Is there any way you need a new perspective, or way of thinking that is more constructive?

How may you sustain changes to your habits?

Where can you get support from others?

Have you given up too early?

-----------------------------------------------------------------

This article may be reproduced if you include the following credit:

Jane Johnson is a Certified Coach and founder of Aspect Coaching. She offers personal and business coaching to professional women in their 30's and 40's who want to develop their professional skills so they can move forward to the next level in their career or business women who are unfulfilled and want to find a career that they feel is their true path in life.

If you wish to receive our FREE ebook: Getting More Done in Less Time, and also receive our FREE ezine, providing valuable information to help you dramatically increase your achievement in the workplace, click on: http://www.aspectcoaching.com/Newsletter.html

Jane can be contacted at: http://www.aspectcoaching.com/index.html

R egister for a complimentary session: http://www.aspectcoaching.com/Compli mentary_Session.html

---

Reach Your Goals - Never Settle For What You Can Currently Imagine

Never settle for what you can currently imagine You are... Read More

Learning From Failure--What To Do When You Blow It!

Becoming successful is not easy. We all get tossed around... Read More

Top Ten Strategies For Becoming Uncommonly Successful

Here are 10 of 26 proven strategies gleaned from interviews... Read More

Reach Your Goals - Creative Multi-Tasking

Multi-task goal-completion work with everyday, "have to" activities If you... Read More

The High Cost of Doing Nothing

Cost is sometimes a difficult term to define. Here, we... Read More

Success Lessons From A Gym Wall And From The Rematch

Recently, I have been riveted by the amazing reality show... Read More

The First And Inevitable Step To Success

Many people ask me how they can be more successful.The... Read More

You Must Play By The Rules

You must play by the rules. Everything has rules. You... Read More

Reach Your Goals - Measure Twice, Cut Once

Measure twice, cut once Just as in carpentry, making sure... Read More

Using A Weekly Review To Improve My Life And Business

"What a week!" you say at the end of a... Read More

How Important is Your Lemonade Stand?

When my neighbor's child was about 8, he decided that... Read More

The Characteristics of a Winner

As kind of a hobby I like to watch people.... Read More

Personal Excellence: Whats Your Motivation? (Part 1 of 3)

I was in the gym, pushing my adolescent muscles to... Read More

Do You Want to Just Survive or Thrive? (Part 2)

"Fighting to pay the bills is hardly worth it? fight... Read More

Overnight Success - the Truth is Revealed

Overnight success seems to be happening to a lot of... Read More

True Success is Generous

"Write checks on a regular basis to those who you... Read More

The 2-Word Phrase That Conquers Adversity and Breaks Through Obstacles

"All the adversity I've had in my life, all my... Read More

Improve Our Income

We all want to improve our top line - our... Read More

You are the President of Your Own Nation

Congratulations! You are the president of your own nation, and... Read More

Advance Your Enthusiasm and Determination for Success

Imagine being firmly committed to your deepest ambitions. Imagine feeling... Read More

Reach Your Goals - Start A Round Robin

Start a "round robin" goal letter with others who need... Read More

Great Century, by George

George Burns' career could have ended as early as 1958,... Read More

Ingredients For Success

Management by Objectives, strategic planning, quality, teams, re-engineering. Passing management... Read More

Benefits To Having An Education

If you look back to the 70s and 80s, many... Read More

Fanning the Flames of Passion -- Reconnecting With Life

Imagine you are a fire. Fires burn at different levels... Read More

Principles Of Success

Succinctly said, success is harmony. When the result is congruent... Read More

The Courage To Act

The world is full of people with great intentions. They... Read More

The 101 Habits of Highly Successful People

Personal missions statements (PMS) are just nothing but the winning... Read More

Hooray, You Failed!

So you vowed to make some changes - develop healthier... Read More

It?s Sure to Succeed

There are "How to" seminars on virtually every business topic.... Read More

STOP Trying Harder

You've been searching for self improvement or personal development. Trying... Read More

How To Prepare Yourself Mentally For Success

Okay, so you've finally made that big decision to start... Read More

Success Formula Revealed - How You Can Apply The Ultimate Success Formula?

When you analyze the traits of successful people, you will... Read More