Reduce Stress and Increase Energy with Your Point of View!

Defending your point of view can use up a lot of your precious energy. As much as 90% of our available energy can be used in this way.

If you do this a lot, stop doing it and see for yourself. You'll probably feel energised, not to mention liberated.

Sometimes it's necessary to 'defend your view'. If someone is trying to persuade you to do something you don't want to do either walk away or say the minimum. Such as "No."

People respect a simple "no", as long as it's said with conviction. Or you can be polite and say "No thanks". Just leave out the "No, but..." as this leaves an opening for the persuader to get back in to try and 'convince' you.

An example is that an ex-partner always wanted me to go skiing. I hated it but he was always trying to persuade me of its merits. This resulted in many tiring arguments where I defended my views on why I disliked it and he defended his views on why he did.

It was exhausting, I felt as if I was in court and had to come up with a good reasons not to ski!

Finally I realised that all it took was a simple, but emphatic "No". He skied, while I enjoyed the apres ski without the ski...bliss!

If you're not defending your right not to do something that you don't want it's even easier. As soon as defending your view stops being pleasant then just stop.

I can remember a huge row that divided a group I met on holiday. It began as a lightheartded chat about a particular movie. It soon became a heated row. The people who liked it thought there must be something wrong with the people who didn't. And vice versa.

I'm not going to say what the movie was, I don't want to start another row! However, I arrived on the beach the next day day to find them all 'fuming' about this ongoing disagreement. They asked if I'd liked the movie. Actually I'd loathed it, but said it just hadn't appealed to me, and I hadn't really thought about why....

I wasn't going to say another thing...I'd learned by too many mistakes.

If they'd asked me in the heat of the row it would have been wise to say I hadn't seen it! After all, whatever they thought or said would not change the fact I hadn't liked it.

That's the crucial point. Nothing anyone said would have changed my experience of that film. People's views are more often changed by experience, rather than persuasion.

It doesn't matter if it's ice-creams, cars, clothes, holidays, that are being discussed.

You know what you like, you know what you don't like. And that's enough. The more we respect the point of view of others the more they respect ours.

Janet trained as a Professional Stress Consultant. She owns the website http://www.womens-natural-health.com which offers lots of free tips for enhancing your health, happiness and beauty.

---

Stressed? Relax Right Now with 5 Super-Simple Stress-Busters

Stressed? Relax Right Now with 5 Super-Simple Stress-BustersStressed-out? Don't know... Read More

Secrets to Aromatherapy II - Psychological Complaints

Aromatherapy is very therapeutic when it comes to healing emotional... Read More

Stress Management: Declare Your Freedom To........................

1) Create the life you desireTwo of our most underdeveloped... Read More

Stress Managment: 5 Things to Clean Out of Your Mental Closet

ExcusesWe all have them. It amazes me how creative I... Read More

Stress Managment: How to Beat the Get By Syndrome

I'm sure you have heard of IBS, irritable bowel syndrome,... Read More

Is Worry Necessary?

Who hasn't experienced "worry" at one time or another? Almost... Read More

Haris Stress Inventory

Conceptualizing stress: Stress often has a negative connotation. Failure, illnesses,... Read More

9 Warning Signs of Stress

Stress is the nastiest 4 letter word you ever met.... Read More

Anger Management: Is It Finally Time To Forgive?

In order to free ourselves from the pain of anger... Read More

7 Tips to Help You De-stress & Handle Your Problems

Life would be so wonderful if it weren't for other... Read More

Stress Managment: 12 Universal Laws for Managing Anger

1. The Law of EveryoneIt is not neccessarily wrong to... Read More

The Message Bill Heard

Voice: Bill!Bill: I thought I heard a voice.Voice: Bill! This... Read More

There is no Such Thing as Good Stress

Q: What is Stress?A: Very basically it is the physical,... Read More

Seven Simple Steps to a Stress-Free Start

Most of us lead busy lives, trying to successfully juggle... Read More

Planning Stress Management

Deadlines at work, demanding bosses, bills to be paid at... Read More

5 Easy Ways to Pamper Yourself

Life is so busy and as mothers we spend so... Read More

Stress Symptoms

Stress relief and managementRecognizing stress symptoms can be a positive... Read More

7 Healthy Ways To Release Holiday Stress

Many people go through the motions during Christmas. If not... Read More

Create Your Own Home Spa

No need to go spend money at a spa! There... Read More

How To Reduce Stress and Ease Worries in Just 3 Minutes

Meditation, relaxation and visualisation are the standard recommendations for reducing... Read More

Wholistics

I have yet to see a scientist talk about the... Read More

Why Stress Management Programmes Don?t Work

Why Stress Management programmes don't work?It seems that every week... Read More

Stress in the Workplace

Why are you so busy? Do you really have too... Read More

Occupational Stress

Statistics tell us that more people have migraine headaches on... Read More

3 Easy Ways to Reduce Stress

Stress, America's #1 health problem, is a leading cause of... Read More

Stress Mangement and Mastery: How to Defeat Sunday Night Syndrome

Picture the following scene:It's Sunday evening, the weekend is winding... Read More

Managing Your Every Day Stresses And Anxieties

Looking for all of the answers in how to manage... Read More

The Underlying Cause of Nervous Breakdowns

Life can offer us many challenges having to do with... Read More

Stress Management: Ditch Thinking or Destination Thinking

Imagine driving down the road. You are driving with a... Read More

Stress In The Workplace

According to the Australian Council of Trade Unions' (A.C.T.U.) 1997... Read More

Stress Relief Tips

With how busy we keep ourselves on a day to... Read More

Stress: Daily Self-Care Habits to Manage Stress

Today we have more stress in our lives than ever... Read More

Stress Managment and Mastery: Too Much to Do Stress - Write it Down, Break it Down, Knock it Down

"I've got too much to do, I've just got too... Read More