Are You REALLY Listening?

Being a good listener requires more than just keeping quiet while the other person is talking. Do you hear everything that is being said? Do you understand it completely?

Here are some tips on how to become a more effective listener:

FOCUS in on the basic message. Try to pinpoint the main ideas the person is expressing. Ask yourself what the speaker is trying to say. If you're not sure, ask. "Bill, I believe what I heard is?Am I on track?"

UNDERSTAND what is being said.

Keep asking yourself if you understand what is being said. If you don't, ask for clarification ? and keep asking until you are sure you fully understand. "Bill, I'm not sure I understand how this relates to that, can you help me out?" What you don't understand, you can't recall. Additionally, if you don't understand what is being said, your mind is more likely to wander and your listening effectiveness diminishes.

Don't get DISTRACTED.

Don't let trivial things like the speaker's appearance or random noises divert your attention from what he or she is saying. Listen to the speaker's whole sentence. Listen not only for content, but context. Anytime you catch yourself being distracted by something that draws your attention away from the speaker's words, make a conscious effort to focus back on the words.

Listen with your "GUT."

The speaker's tone and body language will impart meaning. These subtle clues are quickly picked up by the unconscious mind and leave us with a particular feeling about the speaker. When you are left with a "feeling" about someone after a conversation ? that they are sincere, they are hiding something, they can't be trusted, etc. ? it is a sign that your unconscious mind has put two and two together and come up with an evaluation.

Become PERSONALLY absorbed in what is being said. You can't listen effectively if you are only "going through the motions." Every subject has some interesting angle, some impact on you or something you can learn. In order to uncover those elements, you must first abandon your prejudiced or preconceived ideas. If you enter into a conversation with the notion that the other person has nothing of interest or importance to say, you will miss what is important.

Get INVOLVED.

To keep your active attention on what is being said, and offer comments. If the situation permits, offer your own perspective on what is being said. Ask a question or relate a relevant story that reinforces what the person is saying, or represents a different point of view. Ask yourself how what the person is saying relates to other situations or experiences.

In summary, LISTEN PROACTIVELY

There is more to listening than just passively hearing the words someone is speaking.

Source: The President's Club Report, March-April 1999, ©1999, Sandler Systems, Inc. All rights reserved.

Dan Hudock is an owner of the Sandler Sales Institute in Pittsburgh, PA. He can be reached at (724) 940-2388 or dan@sandler.com. His web site is: http://www.dan.sandler.com

In The News:


pen paper and inkwell


cat break through


15 Ways To Get Really Motivated

First, recognize that motivation is an inside job. The word... Read More

Top 10 Ways to Sell your Product or Service While you Sleep - Part 1

Have you wasted valuable time and money on promotion that... Read More

How To Bully Your Prospects Into Buying Your Product or Service

Selling is a tough job, and sometimes you may need... Read More

Lessons Learned At Gunpoint

"If you do anything foolish or try to get out... Read More

Improve Your Sales Closing Ratio

Occasionally EGOPOWER readers send me questions or topic suggestions that... Read More

2 ½ Steps to Sales Success

You have just walked out of the office of a... Read More

Cracking The Billable Hours Ceiling

How many of you made as much money as you... Read More

Looong and Boooring Sales Letters

You have all seen them,the sales letters that never ends.... Read More

My Competitor Has a Better Product

The topic of this issue's article is a response to... Read More

Handshake Intimidation

In some situations, attempting to intimidate the other person will... Read More

Web Promotion: 10 Amazing Web Promotion Ways To Jump Start Your Sales

Hello, do you have a website and sell something on... Read More

No Regrets

Here's a chilling thought. If you were to die tomorrow,... Read More

Dont Let Rattlesnakes Scare You

Recently I was out trail running along the South Fork... Read More

Getting Referrals

ReferralsA substantial part of your business can come from referrals.... Read More

Ask for the Business

Many times in the process of making a sales presentation... Read More

Nine Keys to Make your Sales Copy Convincing

Would you pay $12,500 to discover the keys to great... Read More

Your Profit is in Your Follow-up: A System for Increased Sales Conversion

No matter what you sell--products, services, or causes--one of the... Read More

When Selling, Keep It Simple Stupid!

After our first half-hour telephone coaching session, when asked what... Read More

Youve Got a Great Business, but Nobody Cares!

I would like to share a disturbing little secret with... Read More

Great Telephone Skills

Having good telephone skills is crucial as the call may... Read More

Four Easy Steps To Building A Powerful Employee Incentive Program

Want to build a successful incentive program for your company?... Read More

How to Leverage Your Influence

Why do we get into sales? Typically it is two... Read More

Your Clients Buying What Youre Selling

Linda felt like she had reached a plateau in her... Read More

Eighty Percent of Success is Showing Up

The above quote, "Eighty percent of success is showing up."... Read More

Going Global: Communication Across Mental Boundaries

A completed communication consists of a sender and a receiver.... Read More

Marketing Conversations, And Conversation Stoppers

Where many marketing conversations get off-track are the ones you... Read More

YOUR Future Profits -- Protect Source With CARE

At 21 years, just out of Business College, I went... Read More

Selling -abilities : Part 2

In the last article... Read More

Health Insurance Lead and Health Insurance Leads

Health insurance lead generation systems provide a stead stream of... Read More

Reviving Dead Clients

Most consultants I've talked to don't spend any time trying... Read More

Get The Help You Need With Fund Raising Ideas

There are many fund raising ideas on the market today... Read More

Powerful Words

Hi, I'd like to discuss the most powerful words you... Read More

Losing the Big-One: Salvaging Lost Accounts

After careful consideration, we have chosen our vendor, and it's... Read More