The Real Way for Men to WOW the Woman They Love

Guys, I know the struggle, you want to give her a gift that will thrill her, really show her how much you care for her. I am always trying to do this for my wife and it takes a serious game plan. I used to think it was a big dollar item that would really Wow her. I realize guys like to keep score, so on a scale of 1-10 a big dollar item thrills my wife a disappointing 5.

Now don't go and click away just yet. I am not talking about engagement rings, houses or cars. I am talking about that expensive diamond necklace she said she wanted. It's a nice piece of jewelry for her birthday in the $200-$300 range. Go ahead and get it and see what score you get?maybe a 6. Now her reaction may be quite vocal and excited but not a 10 on the thrill scale where she stops and looks at you in a way you never saw before.

I don't know if you study her reaction like I do, but after 19 years of marriage I have a mental log of reactions ranging from 1 to 10. I don't really keep score but use this terminology for the article. But men like to really knock her socks off, don't we? I will reveal a trade secret to you now, because I am tired of advertisements to the contrary, trying to convince you that if you REALLY love her you will buy her an EXPENSIVE piece of jewelry. Here it is ? BUZZER -WRONG.

She may even think this herself, but she does not, deep down, BELIEVE it. I am not preaching trying to second guess her for a moment. I am trying to deliver the truth. Guys, what will really get her attention, is what you DO for her. For her, the gift you make has more MEANING. Since it has more meaning, it has more value to her. The meaning was invested by you and your efforts to thrill her. The sweat equity you put into something for her is your main gift to her. She will cherish the thought you put into it for her. Her thought, and reflection on what you did is why she is so thrilled. She is thrilled all of a sudden and like a ton of bricks it will hit her, but it won't go away. Your actual physical gift you made for her, will symbolize your intangible gift and remind her of it for years to come. This is the whole key.

Go ahead and go to the mall and pick up something for her on your way home from work. She will be moderately thrilled at perhaps a 6, and you go on with life as usual. You did your "duty" so she won't get upset with you for completely forgetting. Do yourselves a favor men, drop the charade. Picking up a gift at the mall is the easiest thing you could do and not a cost effective reminder to your loved one that you did not forget a special day for her. So now that I have lambasted an entire foolish notion and the thriving mall jewelry industry, what should you do? Make something for her. But, it takes a game plan.

Yeah, I hear the whining already. Planning. This is not something guys typically want to deal with for a Christmas, birthday or Valentine's gift. Planning, you know something the football team uses to make awesome plays and win the Super Bowl. Planning, the thing you put on your resume and do at work that makes you the big bucks. Planning, the management skill you reasonably present to your boss to justify your next big promotion. But no, planning is not for your wife or girlfriend's thrill factor? Yes it is. That is if you are striving to thrill her. So what is the plan?

Now, remember, you are putting in sweat equity here. You don't need lots of money. In fact you will blow the whole thing if you pull out a wad of cash and try to make the whole thing go away. This method does not work, you tried it already.

Target an end date. Say her birthday, in 3 months. You know how to back off her birthday three months right? OK maybe not. You do know when her birthday is don't you? So do your research then. Find out when her birthday is. Call her sister or something. Find out. OK now you have her birth date. Good start. Don't get peeved at me yet. I know I am digging into your ego here, SHE will thank you later. Just remember that! Now you have a 3 month window. Good start.

You have 3 months to execute your new plan. Here is what you do. So far you have spent 5 minutes remembering her birthday. Not to much trouble. Now find a top notch craft to make her that she will like. "She likes jewelry," you say? OK so make her some jewelry. "You aren't a jeweler", you say. "No problem", I say. I will now interview you for your new craft job to thrill her to no end.

Q: Do you know how to use pliers?

A: Yes

Q: Have you ever had a pair of pliers in each hand?

A: Maybe?

Q: If given two pairs of pliers and some open silver jump rings could you be persuaded to close these jump rings?

A: If shown how I think I could manage.

Q: If given a pattern for some Chainmaille Jewelry that shows you step by step how to make an intricate rare bracelet could you handle it?

A: The hand eye coordination I have gained from using video games has given me all the skills I need sir, consider me a fast learner.

Q: Last question, do you know how to surprise your wife by keeping a secret and making your jewelry project for her when she is gone for the afternoon?

A: Yeah, I can handle that too.

Q: Any questions for me?

A: Where do I get the plans and patterns to make this Chainmaille Jewelry? And how much will it cost me?

A: Wait a minute. I don't have any tools

Solution: Visit culturejewelry.com, we have what it takes to help you make your own chainmaille jewelry.

Matthew Woodbury, author and jewelry designer, comes from a family of jewelers, artists, writers, and engineers going back 155 years. He is showing how all that is necessary to put culture back into jewelry is to use your hands.

---

Cutting the Cord

Sometimes, after a relationship has ended, many of us have... Read More

Interview with Tigress Luv: How To Get Over A Breakup

Recently I had the opportunity to interview my personal favorite... Read More

The Grammar of Good Communication

No, this is not a rehash of primary-school grammar; nor... Read More

Managing Miscommunication - Asking The Agreement Question?

A man and woman were trying to move a couch... Read More

What Does Relational Success Look Like? (Characteristics Of A Growing Relationship)

RELATIONAL SUCCESS...Loving in the good times -- and the not-so-good... Read More

What You Should Know About Domestic Abuse

What is domestic abuse?There are many forms of domestic abuse,... Read More

How To Quickly Turn Platonic Friends into Lovers Using The New 5-Step Jealousy Technique

I'm going to get straight to the point. If you... Read More

How Valentine?s Day Gifts Can Expose a Cheating Husband

If you have the nagging feeling that your husband may... Read More

Great Relationship Advice: The Ability to Apologize and Forgive

I'm sorry can be words that are much too easy... Read More

Why He Left Me After...?

The next morning he /or she is gone. And because... Read More

Noon (A Love Story)

Noon (A Short Love story, dedicated to my wife Rosa)Marina,... Read More

Relationships: Last a Lifetime

Stepping into a new position brought along a few surprises.... Read More

Relationship Advice: 9 More Must-Know Tips for Couples

The Law of Two QuestionsThere are two questions that couples... Read More

The Path of Relationship

Each month after completing and fine tuning Letters on Life... Read More

The Wrong Kind of Love

A lot of people have the wrong kind of love... Read More

When Attracting Sexy Women, Remember... Time And Circumstance Change Everything

Many guys are just too intimidated and full of anxiety... Read More

A Dream of the Perfect Partner

Your dream is so beautiful and it is never to... Read More

The 4 Stages of a Relationship

1. The Perfect Phase is the first three months. If... Read More

When A Relationship Goes Bad

What do you do when a long term relationship goes... Read More

Why Men Cheat

"Big, little or short or tall, Wish I could have... Read More

The Sting of Infidelity Isnt that Bad! Right? Is it?

1. Sleepless nights are part of a victims' experience... Read More

Catch a Cheating Lover?

Relationships. Virtually all of us are in one, or at... Read More

Whos Watching You? Men Arent The Only Stalkers

For decades, the label "stalker' has been tattooed as a... Read More

What?s Special About Abused Women?

Before writing this article, I stopped and thought hard. By... Read More

Top Ten List of What to Do and What Not to Do in Relationships

Most of us who have been intimately involved with someone... Read More

He Still Hasnt Popped the Question - Should You Give Him an Ultimatum?

You've been dating the man forever, and he has yet... Read More

How Can I Get My Partner To Change?

How much energy do you spend trying to get what... Read More

Warning Signs He / She May Not Be The One

We've all looked back on past relationships and said, "What... Read More

60 Words and Phrases that Make Men Fall Deeper in Love

The interesting thing about getting the love you deserve is... Read More

A Diamond Anniversary Ring ? The Perfect Way To Seal Your Love

Some time ago you both made a promise. A promise... Read More

Mental Abuse - The 7 Most Important Things To Know

1. Sticks and stones won't break my bones" ? and... Read More

The Sting

Direct Answers - Column for the week of June 28,... Read More

Flirting For A Long-Term Relationship

Have you ever wondered why we flirt? I mean, we've... Read More