Troll Detection Made Easy
Due to their overwhelming lack of social skills, the gay man's 'trolls' aren't that hard to detect if you know what to look for.
The majority of them are usually oblivious to anyone or anything but themselves, and thus behave in a way that makes you shudder with embarrassment.
A classic example is someone who sends you naked pictures of themselves without asking, or giving any indication that's what they're going to do, first.
Another example is someone who bugs you for your personal contact details even after you have already declined.
There are literally millions of gay men and women online daters out there - you can easily afford to be picky.
If you have a bad feeling about someone, trust it!
However, be aware that there are some other, more malevolent trolls, who will try to bait you and lure you in to talking with them or meeting them.
So how can you tell if they're a troll?
When I first began using online dating I had no idea, I was completely naive.
Resultingly, I fell victim to a troll on more than one occasion ? thankfully I have never been physically bashed but:
? I've been homo-bashed in a chat room by an obvious gay-person hater. In fact, I think it was a 2 or 3 of them having a good laugh.
? I've gone on dates with troll's, more than once. Shortly after we met it became very obvious they were nothing like they described.
? I had to change my phone number because I foolishly gave it out to a desperate troll who wouldn't take 'no' for an answer.
I'm not trying to showcase my stupidity! I am just giving the reasons why I had to, out of necessity, develop some kind of early detection system.
After a lot of trial-and-error, for both myself and my clients, I developed a check-list of yellow-flags'. Here are atwo of them:
1. Move-Out Ya Bum!
If you get any hints that they still live with their mom and dad, that's a sign of a troll.
If they are young then it's probably OK, but most gay online daters are mid-20's and upwards.
From my experience, a grown gay man or woman still living at home is cause for concern.
If a relationship did start, you would have to always use your place. Additionally, you have to wonder if his or her parents even know your date is gay.
If they don't, visiting would be like being 14 all over again?.imagine ? you visit, date introduces you as a friend and then tells his/her mother you are going up to the bedroom..
Mom asks if you want some milk and cookies... and the whole time you're in constant fear she will burst through the door at any time?
You get the picture.
Be sure to clarify, however, who is living with whom. It may be the case that it is the dater's house and their parents actually live with them.
2. The Pungency of Desperation
Any whiff of desperation is a sign - if they can't 'get' anyone, there's probably a good reason.
Desperation can come in the form of:
- wanting to hook-up for a date very soon after you have met them online.
- claiming to love you even though you haven't yet met in person.
- making future plans for your lives together even though you haven't yet met in person.
- talking a lot about depression, intense loneliness, suicide and other dark thoughts.
- telling you very private details about their life way too soon.
- offering to give you their contact details even though you've only spoken (typed) once or twice online.
- when you log into your online dating service there are 6 messages waiting for you even though you only met them online for the first time yesterday.
- being too agreeable. Very easy to fall for this one. If they seem to have no opinion of their own and concur with you on every issue, they may be willing to say anything to get a date.
What do you do? Run like hell!
No seriously, ever heard the song 'Klingons Off The Starboard Bow'?
Well the more desperate a dater is, the more they will cling-on.. it could become a problem you can do without.. like I said earlier, it lead to me changing my phone number!
That's it for today, we have run out of room. To sum up, you need these to recognize these early warning signs to save you from the same tragic events I endured.
So, be wary of a grown man or woman who still hasn't left the nest and be even more wary of the desperate-dater.
In the next part of this series I will discuss 2 more yellow-flag indications the person on the other end is probably a troll and how to get around them.
I call them the 'Statute of Contact Limitations' and 'No Sepia-Toned Photos Please'.
Your Truly,
Adam Coole
http://www.gayandlesbianonlinedatingsecrets.com/gay-
lesbian-articles/gay-dating-coursearti
cle2.htm
To read the rest of this exciting series visit Gay and Lesbian Online Dating SECRETSTM and subscribe now.
"How to easily find your Perfect-Partner online."
Ahh, friends. The people we pick up along the proverbial... Read More
We can fall into the habit of complaining about our... Read More
"The only difference between a rut and a grave are... Read More
Most people experience some degree of shyness from time to... Read More
The question I am asked most often is: I think... Read More
How do you know when it's time to say goodbye... Read More
What are friends for and how can a friendship be... Read More
Dear Candace,I'm 35 years old and ready to open my... Read More
The first thing you want to do is to get... Read More
Scientists are rubbing their hands together with glee. A recent... Read More
So, tonight's the night. You want to have a Romantic... Read More
A genuine apology contains at least four elements: apology, acknowledgment,... Read More
SHHHHHH, don't tell anybody, but, I know the secret.It all... Read More
Discovering an affair in your relationship is indispensable, but that's... Read More
Are men really from Mars, and women from Venus?'what women... Read More
One day a telegram arrived at a man's door. When... Read More
My Dear Lover,Communication is one of the key ingredients for... Read More
Matters of the heart are a true mystery to all... Read More
Work. Bills. Kids. Chores.Etc.All these things get in the way... Read More
"We strengthen a muscle by using it, and that is... Read More
Romantic relationships happen because of the hopes and dreams a... Read More
Questions and Answers from Divine Source Through Barbara Rose1. What... Read More
Leaving an abusive relationship is difficult, but being alone can... Read More
There are seven stages in a romantic relationship: avoidance, meeting,... Read More
Many people know that the zodiac is a circle in... Read More
Please note that this is not an attempt to give... Read More
Getting married (or beginning an intimate relationship) is, in a... Read More
What is it about blondes that both sexes find so... Read More
It doesn't matter how old we are, matters of the... Read More
The dictionary defines infidelity as "unfaithfulness to a sexual partner".... Read More
What is Love? This question has bothered me for a... Read More
Every person that thinks something is amiss in their relationship... Read More
Caution is a word with a fine old-fashioned ring. The... Read More
So you've decided to propose ? congratulations! This is a... Read More
"To love, honour and cherish", easy words to say during... Read More
To tell you the truth, I'm a little disillusioned with... Read More
"We don't have to wait till Valentine's Day to think... Read More
Today I received a question from a guy. Here is... Read More
Please note that this is not an attempt to give... Read More
The focus of this article is to explore what it... Read More
The Law of Connection: Spouses are either growing closer or... Read More
Have you noticed the trend?You ever notice how on programs... Read More
You are hurt, you are angry, you are simply devastated.Things... Read More
February will bring with it one of the most important... Read More
CHESS-MATEIf you're one of those guys telling to yourself that... Read More
The problem with choosing a dating service is choice --... Read More
1) Think short term.Many people enter marriage with the same... Read More
Online infidelity is more prevalent than you think. This includes... Read More
One of the most underrated concepts that most people overlook... Read More
Are you dreading the holidays because you are single? For... Read More
Your Beloved Soldier Is Coming Home ? Now What?Laura anxiously... Read More
I have been counseling couples for 35 years. Quite often... Read More
How many of you have ever been involved with a... Read More
It's very easy to look, from the outside, at another... Read More
"If he comes we welcome, If he goes we do... Read More
We used to joke amongst the couples we are close... Read More
Why is it that even though I am not positive... Read More
It is possible for women to steer clear of an... Read More
Troll Detection Made EasyDue to their overwhelming lack of social... Read More
Stan is an incurable romantic. Ever since he started courting... Read More
"Every three months or 3,000 miles."That's how the sticker in... Read More
Dear Candace,I'm 35 years old and ready to open my... Read More
Everyone has something they'd like to change in their partner.... Read More
Ultimately, you want a partner you can be your true... Read More
In my work with couples, certain themes have emerged that... Read More
Over the past few months, things in my life have... Read More
Relationship |