Learning From Life

Do you ever find yourself thinking, "Life has taught me some tough lessons, and the scars do not heal easily."? This article can help you learn valuable lessons from the past, instead of allowing the past to determine your future.

The quality of the life we live, is based upon the learning we derive from our experiences. I know that for myself, it is sometimes easy to feel that "Life has taught me some tough lessons, and the scars do not heal easily." When I find myself thinking like this it means that I have fallen into the trap of believing that "It is 'only natural' that an 'X' type event or relationship, will lead to a 'Y' type response." At other times it becomes apparent that if I had somehow learned something different from a particular challenging situation, the quality of my life would be much more rewarding.

In working with a client struggling with alcoholism, we spent our first session with the client telling me in detail how he had come to live such an unhealthy debilitating life. In short he said: "Both my parents were alcoholics, and both of them were physically abusive to me. I grew up never knowing what bad thing would happen next. I learned from my parents that the best way to not have to feel the pain and uncertainty of life was to escape into an altered state of alcohol induced euphoria." When listening to a client tell such a sad story, it is easy to believe that their situation was all but preordained.

As fate would have it, a week after beginning to work with this client, I went to a business luncheon to hear an inspirational speaker discuss how we can live our life fully, and succeed in times of hardship. Indeed, the speaker was truly inspirational. When the talk was over I waited around to thank him.

After introducing myself and thanking him, I asked him how he had come to lead such an exemplary life. He looked around to make sure no one else was listening and in a low voice he said the following: "Both my parents were alcoholics, and both of them were physically abusive to me.I grew up never knowing what bad thing would happen next. I learned from my parents that the worst possible way to deal with the pain and uncertainty of life was to escape into an altered state of alcohol induced euphoria. My parents taught me a difficult but very important lesson. I learned from them that staying present in the moment is the only real chance we have for living a fulfilling life."

What a truly great example of embodied spirit the motivational speaker offers us. The quality of our life is not dependent on the circumstances we encounter. The quality of our life is dependent on what we learn from the circumstances we encounter. Perhaps the greatest example of this wisdom is present in the life of Nelson Mandela. He is a man that suffered great pain and hardship, and somehow his suffering seasoned his soul in a way that has led him to be compassionate and caring.

In the course of exploring how to live our life more fully we can consider pondering one question over and over again, "What can I learn from the difficulties I am experiencing, that will actually ADD to the quality of my life?" At the very least we can begin to entertain the fact that: We can derive a wide range of learning from any single circumstance, event, or relationship. When we get the most stuck in life is when we believe that the one thing we did learn is the only thing that can be learned.

About The Author

Charlie Badenhop is the originator of Seishindo, an Aikido instructor, NLP trainer, and Ericksonian Hypnotherapist. Benefit from a new self-help Practice every two weeks, by subscribing to his complimentary newsletter "Pure heart, simple mind" at http://www.seishindo.org

---

Rebuild Those Plans

Byron and I started our first business full of enthusiasm... Read More

Moving? Pack an Emotional First Aid Kit

From Making the Big Move: how to transform relocation into... Read More

Change Your Attitude from a Whiner to a Winner

Who are the Whiners? Whiners are the people who always... Read More

Magic Mirror Exercise

Good morning I love you.This is a basic exercise, which... Read More

Positive Affirmations

Never used 'em. Not likely to start now.OK, so I... Read More

Thought Patterns To Create Success

Let's say you're ready to change some aspect of your... Read More

Universal Thought Systems #4

Before we are able to use the Universal Thought System... Read More

Prisoner of Attitude

"Thinking is responsible for man's primacy on earth today. Existence... Read More

Mental Fitness For Confidence And Winning In Life

Studies show that men and women profit most with having... Read More

A Recovering Ragers Creed

A rager, or rageaholic, is a person who is addicted... Read More

Have a Present Moment!

It was the 10th day of rain, and I walked... Read More

Business Career, Executive Coaching - The Top 10 Tips to Begin the Practice of Positive Affirmations

Positive Affirmations are things we say to ourselves that build... Read More

Impact of Positive and Negative Catalysts on Events in Human Lives

Have you ever noticed what can happen if you just... Read More

Being Assertive

Many people find it extremely difficult to be assertive, whether... Read More

Why You Want What You Cant Have

"You can't always get what you want . . ."... Read More

Reframing Rejection

So people will reject us no matter how good we... Read More

Beginners Programming 101

Recently a great idea popped into my head about creating... Read More

Harness The Power Of Words In Your Life

Speaking comes to most people as naturally as breathing. On... Read More

Change Your Focus and Change Your Results

In his all-time bestselling record The Strangest Secret, author Earl... Read More

Is Your Glass (Ceiling) Half Empty or Half Full?

The infamous "glass ceiling" is blamed for business issues for... Read More

Fearing the Future: I am what I Fear!

When we were children, we were fearless. We would stick... Read More

Change in the Workplace: Don?t Fear It; Use It!

Every day something changes at work: your products, your customers,... Read More

Im Loving Me... Right Where I Am

I heard these words from a client who had been... Read More

Thinking Your Way To Success: Materializing Your Goals Through The Power of Thought

THOUGHTS are powerful. The power of THOUGHTS cannot be underestimated.... Read More

How to Experience Life as a Thrilling Adventure

"Adventure isn't hanging on a rope off the side... Read More

Words, Ignorance, And Casper The Friendly Ghost!

Words, Ignorance, and Casper The Friendly Ghost!Do your best to... Read More

Individualized Positive Affirmations for Improving Self-Esteem

Positive self-esteem is very important if not crucial to our... Read More

What?!? No Bananas?

"Where are your bananas?" It seemed like a logical question... Read More

C-R-I-T-I-C-I-S-M

Yuk!One thing, I really have a problem with is criticism.... Read More

All Your Problems Are Based In False Beliefs!

All the problems that any individual has in their lives... Read More

Changing Stumbling Blocks To Stepping Stones?

"The difference between a stumbling block and a stepping stone... Read More

How Do You Habitually Treat Yourself?

In order to learn how to relieve ourselves of self-defeating... Read More

Positive Thought

The power of positive thoughts to affect one's experience of... Read More