Where Is Your Homework, Lisa?

Is Homework Really That Important?

Dear Friends,

I no longer teach in public schools, but for what seems like 100 years, I did. During my long career, I did the best I knew how to do at the time, based on where I was in life, and what I had learned about teaching.

In parenting and teaching both, however, we sometimes learn things too late. If only I could go back, I would do many things differently. One thing I would handle differently would be homework.

Today, I?m going to address an issue that raises the hair on the heads of many people: Homework. Homework is so revered in our culture that to oppose it can almost result in being one declared a heretic.

I?m going to tell you about the proverbial straw that prompted me to end homework forever. (That is, except for optional homework I gave so that the kids whose parents wanted something to occupy their kids at home other than television had something constructive to do.)

One day, I heard ?.

?Help! Help my mommy! He's beating her! And he took the baby! Help!?

Those are words of a real little girl named Lisa, who called 911 in California when her father was in one of his violent rages. A tape of the actual phone call was played at a domestic violence meeting I attended some years back in Atlanta.

We listened as the six year old child cried and begged the police to get to her mommy before it was too late. We could hear sounds in the background that reminded us the situation was both urgent and real.

I could almost picture the woman being slammed to the ground as her drunken husband held the baby above her with a smirk, reminding her that he would take that baby and she'd never see him again if she didn't get up and do as he ordered right that minute.

The police arrived, and the tape ended. My face felt wet with tears that did not stop when the speaker hit the stop button.

As I sat there, my "teacher" mind started thinking. If that little girl was in a typical classroom, the next morning, Lisa would walk into her class at school, pretending all was well. Even at age six, she knew how to play the game.

And then, before long, the teacher would ask for homework. Lisa would look through her bookbag, hoping that somehow, the homework would magically appear. But of course, the miracle she needed right then didn't happen. (She needed that miracle much more the previous night, but that?s a whole different issue.)

A moment later, she'd hear her name called. She'd go to the teacher's desk, and the teacher would speak to her firmly. "Lisa? I don't see your homework. Where is it? Did you forget to do it again?"

Lisa would lower her head, nodding nervously. "Yes, mam," she'd say.

"Lisa, I don't know what we're going to do with you, but I can tell you right now that at this rate, you are going to make an F on your report card. You won't do your homework. I have six zeros written in my grade-book for you, and this is only the second week of the quarter," the teacher informs Lisa.

Lisa says nothing, but inside, she feels her little body tensing up.

"Lisa!" the teacher snarls. "I spoke to you. WHY won?t you do your homework? You certainly won?t pass first grade if you keep this up! What happened to the note that I sent home to your parents? Did you show it to them? I bet you didn't, because I know your dad, and I know he'd see that you did your homework if he knew what was going on."

Lisa's eyes get big, and she starts to speak but she cannot get any words out.

"Lisa! WHERE IS THE NOTE I SENT HOME YESTERDAY?" the teacher says. Lisa hears snickering sounds coming from the other students, who probably are relieved that SHE is the one getting in trouble, not them.

"Ummm .... I have it at home. I forgot to show it to my mom, but I will tonight," Lisa says.

"You forgot? Bring that note AND the homework back tomorrow!" the teacher replies. "Or else!"

All of a sudden, the lights came on and I realized that the meeting was over. I was not in the mood to socialize with the other attendees. All I could focus on was getting out of the meeting.

I had been learning towards ending homework for my students, but after I heard that tape, I knew I would never make an issue of homework again. For all I knew, every child in the classroom could be living through similar nightmares at home. In the big scheme of life, is homework REALLY that important?

Quote for the week: "If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away." - Henry Thoreau (1817-1862)

I wish you peace.

Karyl
Reluctant Traveler

Karyl Chastain Beal
The Reluctant Traveler Columbia, Tennessee Mother, Writer, Teacher, Student

Arlyn's memorial website http://virtual-memoria ls.com/servlet/ViewMemorials?memid=7461&pageno=1

Grieving Parents http://grieving-parents.com

Suicide Memorial Wall http://www.suicidememorialwall.com

In The News:


pen paper and inkwell


cat break through


Identifying Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder in the Classroom: Eight Things Teachers Should

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is the phrase that is... Read More

MORAL ARMORS Irrational Parenting, Part I

"If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think... Read More

Is Your Child Becoming A Praise Junkie?

Do you praise your child when he fulfils a basic... Read More

What the Matter Is

When my oldest boy was really young, he tickled my... Read More

Spelling Games

The following spelling games can be used by parents to... Read More

Sibling Rivalry: The Magic Trick That Stops It Instantly

It's a familiar scene: Kids screaming at each other, complaining... Read More

Drinking and Driving: Will Your Child Become a Statistic?

Just two days ago, another 15-year old child was added... Read More

Developing a Fantastic Relationship with Your Child

Here's a scene: A parent "might suddenly grab a happliy... Read More

Just What Is A Learning Disability?

A learning disability is defined as a permanent problem that... Read More

Help Your Kids Learn More About Managing Their Personal Economy

Remember when cash was a tangible commodity in all of... Read More

How to Find The Best Time To Be With Your Kids

"Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing... Read More

How to Foster a Love of Reading and Writing in Your Child

The key to lifelong learning is reading and writing. When... Read More

The Ten Most Common Poisons Among Kids

For parents, keeping our kids safe is a constant top... Read More

Considering Daycare? Consider the Pros and Cons

When you're a parent it's a difficult decision to know... Read More

Difference

There are times when my ideas of raising a child... Read More

Kids: Channeling Mania Towards Productivity

More and more kids these days are diagnosed ADD, ADHD,... Read More

Why Wont My Child Do as I Say?

In speaking with parents a comment I frequently hear is... Read More

ADD / ADHD Children : Being Your Childs Best Friend

Do you live with an ADD / ADHD child? If... Read More

Meeting The True Needs of Children Diagnosed As ADHD

How should one look upon Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)... Read More

Develop Your Childs Genius: One Step Farther

When is a person brilliant? When does a person show... Read More

Puberty - Get Ready to Play the Puberty Game

Puberty can be a difficult time for children. Not quite... Read More

How To Homeschool Without Making Your Child An Outcast

If you are currently homeschooling or considering homeschooling your child,... Read More

Bath Time Fun

Bath time can be fun or it can be a... Read More

How to Parent Your Teen Effectively

Maintain CommunicationEven though teens need to separate from their parents... Read More

The Seven Keys of Being a Father

Is there a fathering instinct?Celebrated child development expert Erik Erikson... Read More

Top Seven Tips To Become A Good Stepmother

Becoming a stepmother can undoubtedly be one of the most... Read More

Theres Never a Bad Time To Start Helping To Spread The Word of God

Q. What's the right age to start giving a Bible... Read More

Do You Have the Loving Relationship With Your Children That You Desire?

Most people with children want to be good parents. The... Read More

Eye-Opening Questions for Working Parents to Ask

I remember watching my 18-month-old son eat a big frosted... Read More

The Best Gifts Ever: Life Experiences Every Child Should Have

This past holiday season Canadians spent over $45 billion-with parents... Read More

School Holiday Survival Guide

The school holidays are a great time for the kids,... Read More

Watch Your Language! - How Parents Can Help Kids Help Themselves

'I felt great until I walked into the classroom -... Read More

Thirteen Values You Can Teach Through Homework

Are you a parent concerned about passing values on to... Read More