You Goofed? Hip, Hip, Hooray!

Certainly we all want our children to excel. But it takes most kids years to find their strengths; if they don't try everything that comes their way --from kickball to spelling bees-- how will they discover their passions?

One thing that parents can model is to value 'effort' and 'risk'. Kids whose parents praise things like 'trying,' 'giving their best effort' and 'finishing what they've started' seem to have kids who try, give their best effort and finish things! While competition is a great teacher, there are also times that it is as important to reward participation as achievement.

Rewarding the courage to compete builds confidence and helps to combat the stigma attached to losing. People often forget that losing is nature's best teacher. High achieving adults we've interviewed confirmed that adversity and struggle (e.g. 'losing') taught them what they needed to do to win the next time!

Kids shouldn't be afraid of losing. Hug and praise them no matter how well or poorly they do. Go easy on the sympathy if they lose. Soft-pedal the congratulations if they win. In either case, ask them what they learned or what they'll try next time.

Remember, your offsprings' 'won/loss' record is not a reflection of your parenting skill? but their attitudes, values and ethics are. Whether they win or lose you can teach them to show the same respect for everyone who competes, to push themselves toward improvement and give to their best.

As with so many aspects of being a parent, it's all in how you approach it.

Andrea Patten is the co-author of What Kids Need to Succeed: Four Foundations of Adult Achievement which is now available on Amazon.com

For more information about 'The Four Foundations' please visit http://www.whatkidsneedtosucceed.com

"...becau se you're not raising a child - you're raising a future adult"

---

Power Foods for a Powerful School Lunch

There isn't a school day that goes by that I... Read More

What Are Reasonable Expectations of a Child?

To have reasonable expectations of our children is an important... Read More

The Top 5 Reasons Why Unwed-Parents Must Establish Paternity

"It takes a village to raise a child" is more... Read More

Thirteen Values You Can Teach Through Homework

Are you a parent concerned about passing values on to... Read More

Small Children, Languages and Myths

Our children are growing up bilingual in the French part... Read More

Surprising Fun Solution to Kids Moods and Attitudes

As a parent, are you at your wits end? Does... Read More

Back to School

It is hard to believe that summer is coming to... Read More

Natural Disasters: Help Your Child Cope With The Anxiety

How on earth can you help your family cope with... Read More

Awesome Dads Top Ten Communication Intentions

An Awesome Dad in by no means perfect. But that... Read More

Helping Your Children Develop Their Self-Discipline

We want our children to do the right thing, especially... Read More

The 411 on Natural Colic Remedies

Any parent whose baby has suffered from colic can tell... Read More

Is There Any Real Use For A Fun Quiz?

Q. I don't like my children spending so much time... Read More

?Gimme? Proof Your Kids: How To Keep Your Child?s Materialism In Check

It's the first day of the summer holiday. Five year-old... Read More

7 Ways to Know Your Child

How well do you really know your child?There is so... Read More

The Hardest Job I Ever Had

I used to have a really challenging job. It was... Read More

Confident Kids : Why Some Parents Should Carry a Health Warning

As a hypnotherapist, I am acutely aware of the power... Read More

The Ten Things That Successful Parents Do

1. They are leaders as well as parents. They don't... Read More

Parents/Teens and Money ? 5 Ideas for Keeping the Peace

Children and teenagers are relentlessly bombarded with merchandise that entices.... Read More

ADD / ADHD Children : Being Your Childs Best Friend

Do you live with an ADD / ADHD child? If... Read More

Teaching Your Child Safety

Q. What is the best way to teach safety awareness... Read More

Parenting Styles - Overcoming Your Differences

If you spend any time in the parenting section of... Read More

Authoritarian Parenting, Permissive Parenting, or Loving Parenting

Angie was brought up by rigid, authoritarian parents who kept... Read More

How to Create an Emotional Bond with Your Child

One of the most powerful tools that parents have for... Read More

Avoid Weight Problems In Children

Although, not a well publicized statistic, childhood obesity has more... Read More

How to Stop Divorce Parental Conflict from Bursting?

It is not the divorce but the conflict arising after... Read More

Secrets from the Classroom: Avoiding Summer Learning Loss

In June, elementary school children across North America cheered as... Read More

Considering Daycare? Consider the Pros and Cons

When you're a parent it's a difficult decision to know... Read More

Clean Kid Syndrome - Does Your Child Suffer from it?

The learning and development of Australian kids is under threat... Read More

Examining Drugs for ADHD, Particularly Strattera

In memory of 14 year old Matthew Smith; 11 year... Read More

Spanking Children

Results of the Spanking Poll on Rexanne.com: Voters - 233Percentage... Read More

Misplaced Passion

"Before every action, ask yourself: Will this bring more monkeys... Read More

From Birth to Teen, Spirituality in Children

Until about the age of six, children do not generally... Read More

Work Before Play

Many families, ours included, have learned that breakfast is eaten... Read More