Lets Not Hurry Children Through Childhood

Have you ever experienced one of those days when you wanted to return to the carefree days of childhood when your biggest worry was how you could con your parents into staying up a little longer at night. Have you ever thought that you would like to be a child once more when the biggest decision for the day was choosing which topping put on your ice cream?

While this worry-free existence maybe idealised, there is little doubt that most parents want to capture this carefree, happy feeling for their children.

But many children feel the same stress that adults feel. In a culture that values success they can easily be pressured to grow up to quickly. It appears that the pressure for children to perform is perhaps strongest in the United States.

American author Dr. Gail Gross writes, "Many parents seek to create "super kids," pressuring their children into becoming premature adults and making them overly competitive. Ironically, in their eagerness to create an academic prodigy, overzealous parents often create an underachiever."

My feeling is that many parents in Australia are unwittingly going down the American parental track of raising kids to develop academically at a quicker rate ? i.e. to be smarter and more competent but at a younger age.

Dr. David Elkind, author of The Hurried Child, advises parents to let children be children. His research suggests that students are more likely to have academic success if they were not hurried through their early childhood by parents who overestimate their child's competence and overexpose them to academic experience.

Ironically, when parents release the pressure and focus on developing children's general well being they perform better in the long run. The London School of Economics Centre for Economic Performance followed the fortunes of all babies born in the first week of April 1970 in Britain. There was clear evidence that children with a higher self-esteem at the age of 10 got as much kick to their earning power as those with higher maths, reading and other academic abilities. They had less chance of being unemployed later in life and if they were, they would soon be back in the workforce.

To avoid hurrying children through childhood it helps to honour their natural instincts to play and avoid continually turning their play into work or even some type of learning experience. Play fosters creativity and reduces stress. Play is a life skill that many adults have forgotten about.

It helps for children to have plenty of free time when they can just hang around and basically do nothing. It is strange but in our increasingly achievement oriented culture the notion of free time is equated with laziness or lack of ambition. Adults and children can benefit from some free time when nothing productive is achieved whatsoever.

It also helps to remember that children may act grown up but they don't often feel grown up. While it maybe possible to accelerate their academic development it is impossible to accelerate their emotional maturation.

A post World War 2 British mental health inquiry concluded that the major contributor to an adult's general wellbeing and happiness was the existence of a happy childhood. By ensuring that children have a long, happy childhood we provide a solid foundation for happy, well-adjusted adulthood.

Childhood is an important stage of life that needs to be protected and valued by adults. It is a stage of life worth preserving for as long as we can, not something to be rushed through.

Michael Grose is Australia's leading parenting educator. He is the author of six books and gives over 100 presentations a year and appears regularly on television, radio and in print.

For further ideas to help you raise happy children and resilient teenagers visit http://www.parentingideas.com.au . While you are there subscribe to Happy Kids newsletter and receive a free report Seven ways to beat sibling rivalry.

---

Thriving As A Family When You Live In The Fast lane

It is extraordinary times that we find ourselves in. Change... Read More

Americas Public schools --- Deteriorating Like They Did In Ancient Rome

The citizens of the early Roman Republic enjoyed an education... Read More

7 Ways to Know Your Child

How well do you really know your child?There is so... Read More

Tips For a First-Time Dad

So you're going to become a father. Now is not... Read More

Communications for Family Emergencies

You know that children can get into trouble. The older... Read More

Does Your Child Need A Bedtime Routine? - Yes!

Do you struggle to get your child to bed at... Read More

Ten Terrific Ideas for Rainy Day Fun

It's been raining for a week and the kids and... Read More

Want To Further Your Childrens Studies?

Being in a competitive world, the lowest qualification to secure... Read More

Partnering With Your Daycare or Preschool

For the most positive daycare experience for your child, partner... Read More

Stop Lying NOW

Do you have a consistent problem with your child lying... Read More

The 5 Babysitter Commandments

Having a babysitter take care of your kids is sometimes... Read More

How to Make Kids More Likeable?

Nothing touches the heartstrings of a parent more than the... Read More

The Twenty-First Century Parent

John was a 43 year-old sales manager at a large... Read More

Fizzy Sherbet ? A Sweet Science Lesson for Your Kids!

Fizzy sherbet in a paper bag with a strawberry lollipop... Read More

Help Your Kids Learn More About Managing Their Personal Economy

Remember when cash was a tangible commodity in all of... Read More

How To Potty Train In Two Days

Ah, potty training! Go to a local bookseller and you... Read More

Raising a Self-Sufficient Teen

Teens don't learn responsibility overnight. If you haven't been working... Read More

Marriage, Divorce, and Kids

Are men to blame for the divorce problem in this... Read More

Psychological Effects of Child Abuse

Many children who suffer from the psychological effects of child... Read More

Illegal and Legal Drug Usage in the United States

How bad is the illegal drug problem here in the... Read More

Birth of a Parent

So you're pregnant. Congratulations! Your life is about to change... Read More

7 Ways Busy Families Can Volunteer

Volunteering together is a fantastic way to spend time as... Read More

Lead with Love:How Mothers Can Use Their Greatest Strength to Manage Around Their Technical Weakness

My wife and I have been working on a video... Read More

The Mystery of Child Beliefs, Spirit in Children, Understanding Spirtuality in Children

In the wonderment of childhood, it is easier for a... Read More

What Are Reasonable Expectations of a Child?

To have reasonable expectations of our children is an important... Read More

Parenting: 6 Observations on Fatherhood

Just the other day my oldest son asked:"Daddy, am I... Read More

Avoid Weight Problems In Children

Although, not a well publicized statistic, childhood obesity has more... Read More

Teaching Reading: Part 3, Whole Language Vs. Phonics

There are two methods for teaching children to read; whole... Read More

Small Children, Languages and Myths

Our children are growing up bilingual in the French part... Read More

Nurtured by Love or Matured by Nature?

"There is nothing new under the sun," states Ecclesiastes 1:9.... Read More

Are You Addicted to Your Children?

Is it possible to be using our children addictively?Anything that... Read More

Parents/Teens and Money ? 5 Ideas for Keeping the Peace

Children and teenagers are relentlessly bombarded with merchandise that entices.... Read More

Healthy Eating Alone Is Not The Answer

Along with eating healthier we need to be more active.... Read More