When Gifts Say More

What's a gift mean? If you're like me, you probably focus on the giving and the getting.

But, have you thought of gifts as a medium, a channel, for communication? In a book called The Gift, French anthropologist Marcel Mauss argues that gifts are universally used to create and manage relationships.

For those of us interested in business communication, the idea of managing work relationships with gifts brings several interesting issues to our attention.

The most obvious notion is that in sending gifts, we communicate our appreciation for what someone did. It signals awareness that the recipient did something exemplary. Usually, the communication is implicit, perhaps even subtle, even though the gift may be tangible.

In a workplace context, bonuses are often seen as gifts, a discretionary act on the part of a manager to show appreciation. It is in the manager's power to reward or not reward, and hence the gifting effect.

Stock options, on the other hand, represent something different; there is no managerial discretion in their value, but there may be discretion involved in giving them.

And don't we all consider the type and value of a gift as an indicator of the strength of the relationship? I think we've all been through those debates about how much we should spend when a staff member gets married, has a baby, retires, or quits.

In each of these examples, it's not hard to see gifts as a tool for strategically managing relationships. We can also see gifts as a medium (like a newsletter) for exchanging messages.

What we've discussed so far assumes that a gift is an object or service that one purchases or makes and gives to another. But, in an organizational context, a gift might be mentorship, an unexpected promotion, or acceptance of another person's opinion.

Consider meetings where opinions fall into two clear camps. And, out of the blue, someone who previously opposed your position or stayed neutral now moves to support you. That person smiles at you, and says, "I think you've put your finger on the real issue here." Seems like a gift, doesn't it?

Or consider this one, "Jane, you've worked a lot of hours lately to make this presentation a big success. We appreciate what you've done, and want you to take the rest of the week off. Don't worry about your to-do list; we'll take care of everything." Another type of gift.

In the mass media, reporters and editors normally cannot accept gifts, or gifts beyond a threshhold value. It's a way of avoiding relationship obligations that might influence their coverage of events, people, and organizations. In this case we see the rejection of gifts as a way of avoiding relationships.

In summary, look at exchanges of gifts as potentially more than just an exchange between individuals; think of them as a strategic tools for developing and managing business relationships. That makes giving a strategic form of communication.

Robert F. Abbott writes and publishes Abbott's Communication Letter. Learn how you can use communication to help achieve your goals, by reading articles or subscribing to this ad-supported newsletter. An excellent resource for leaders and managers, at: http://www.communication-newsletter.com

---

Small File Box With Resumes to Help Customers

I bet you have not thought about it much, but... Read More

Networking: Is Your Approach Too Self-Centered?

It's a classic mistake by networkers: their approach is focused... Read More

9 Ways to Spice Up Your Nametags for More Engaging Conversation

Nametags are worn for a variety of jobs and functions,... Read More

Communication Is A 2-Way Street (The Networking Factor)

The Personal Touch 1There is a simple art to networking... Read More

How to Announce a New Product

How can the introduction of new products affect the way... Read More

Acknowledging Referrals! What?s in It For You?

I grew up in a household where saying thank you... Read More

Why Cant I Remember Your Name?

You're terrible with names. You forget someone's name within ten... Read More

How to Get More Visibility, Increase Your Influence, and Get More Referrals

Earlier today I was helping a client develop a better... Read More

Successfully Meeting And Greeting - Ten Strategies For Getting Off To A Good Start

A day in the life of every businessperson is made... Read More

The Power of Word of Mouth

Most of us remember the commercial that said, "I told... Read More

The Secrets to Networking Success

Recently I was interviewed for a book on networking. My... Read More

Defining a Quality Networking Group

When it comes to quality, how do you choose the... Read More

Five Steps for Expanding Your Customer Base with Guerilla Networking

As a single company, it is impossible to provide your... Read More

Give People Something to Talk About!

My husband and I tried an experiment one night. We... Read More

Measuring Value for a Networking Group

How do you measure a group's worth to your organization?It... Read More

How NOT to Waste Your Time Networking

Ever wonder if networking, referral groups, and conferences are a... Read More

Are You Really Listening: The Importance of Strong Communication Skills

Let's face it, when most people think of IT professionals,... Read More

Create a 10 Second Introduction From Your USP

You can generate a ton of business by networking, whether... Read More

Plan for the Event or Flounder

Rather than being there to eat the food and drink... Read More

Success Sentences to Help Combat Conversational Crappiness

Essential to your success as an effective, engaging communicator is... Read More

Growing Your Network of People Can be Easy and Fun!

A few years back when I moved to Charlotte, NC... Read More

62 Ways to MAXIMIZE Your Approachability

If you walk into your local bookstore and pick up... Read More

How Speakers, Exhibitors, Consultants, and Meeting Planners Partner-Generate More Money and Value

? "Make Every Moment Count" is the title of a... Read More

The Quest for Passive Income

Passive Income, residuals, royalties three ways to get paid multiple... Read More

Networking - How To Do It

Networking is probably the oldest, easiest, most effective and least... Read More

Why Bother With Social Networking Sites Like LinkedIn?

Q: I think I understand the value of networking as... Read More

How to Avoid Falling Asleep Behind the Conversational Wheel

Think about the last time you feel asleep behind the... Read More

Four Brainless Self-Promotion Techniques To Avoid

Many workers think that their hard work will speak for... Read More

Is The Company You Keep Hurting Your Business?

When you look at your friends, it's like looking into... Read More

Unforgettable First Impressions Part 4: Become a Social Gift Giver

Do you ever wonder why single people give flowers, wine,... Read More

Mother Said - Wash Your Hands

Think health articles are boring? This one isn't, so read... Read More

Build Your Business through Strategic Networking

Networking ? it's the latest business trend. Or is it?Actually,... Read More

The 7 Habits of Highly Horrible Networkers

Networking is a term that didn't exist (academically) until almost... Read More