Change Your Life, Release Fear, and Create What you Really Want

Do you have a dream? Or do you just have a nagging feeling that life could better?

Many of us have a life that we know is not what we really want, but perhaps we've become resigned to it, believing that 'this is all there is for me' or 'it's OK, really?' or even, 'it's too late to change anyway.'

The reason for this resignation is usually because of fear. It can be scary to look at what you REALLY want ? perhaps, once you found it, you'd find it was out of your reach ? and how do you live with that? Perhaps you'd find you'd have to make difficult sacrifices. Or perhaps you feel you are just not good enough. Is this what you have been told? If so, it was you who chose to believe it. You can also choose to believe otherwise. Most of us have been stopped by fear, lack of confidence, past experience, until we are so hemmed in by our lack of belief, that we accept a life of mediocrity and we decide that there is nothing that we are passionate about, this life is OK for me? it will do.

My belief is that everyone ? everyone ? has something they are passionate about ? and getting in touch with that can be an incredibly moving and inspiring experience.

I also believe that EVERYONE can achieve the thing they are passionate about. Whatever it is ? whether it's gardening, climbing mountains, helping people ? the thing that you love doing most of all is an expression of who you are ? and that is out there for you.

How, then, do you find that thing ? THE thing that will bring happiness and fulfilment?

For a moment, forget everything you have been told, or you have told yourself about your inability to succeed. Imagine that there were no obstacles. Imagine that anything is possible.

Do you remember a time, or times, in your life when you were purely happy? Where time became non-existent and you were totally focused on what you were doing? You might have to look right back into your childhood ? it doesn't matter. It can be something really silly and trivial. Just have a look.

Then, look at what it was about that thing you were doing that made it so wonderful.

When I was little there were two things I really, really loved doing: reading, and climbing trees.

So, how do I transfer climbing trees into my adult life? I have no desire to become a tree surgeon!

Well ? what I loved about climbing trees was this: every tree was different and its own challenge; there was a definite goal: to get to the top of the tree; and, I could be totally independent ? no-one could help, I had to do it myself.

Look at these things as a metaphor for life and you can see that I love variety and challenge, I like to be aiming towards something and I love to work for myself. Put this together with what I like about reading: the fascinating characters and the way they develop ? and you can begin to see why I eventually became a life coach and a writer!

It may not be obvious at first, but if you work on this technique, you may open yourself to the possibilities around you that call to who you are.

And when you have found the thing that you are truly passionate about, what are you going to do to make it happen?

You are going to look all those restricting thoughts that now come to mind ? those voices in your head that are telling you you're too old, too young, too stupid, not good enough, not brave enough, not clever enough etc, etc? - and you are going to put them aside. They are not real ? they are just thoughts that you have chosen to believe. Then you are going to choose some empowering thoughts ? you are going to choose to believe in yourself, and you are going to start telling yourself that you are good enough, that you can make it happen. Then you are going to take the first steps towards your goal.

If this seems too difficult at first, you will find it beneficial to work with a coach, who will encourage you every step of the way, and remind you, when things get hard, that anything is possible, that you have the power to make it happen. Your coach will set goals with you, and build your confidence so that your belief in yourself will eventually create the life you are passionate about.

Ros Bott BA (Hons) FAETC is a trained life coach, writer and trainer. She specialises in Career and Confidence coaching, and is passionate about helping people to express their true selves in life. For more details: http://rosbott.com

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