Sometimes life experiences can be like a lemon-flavored Tootsie Roll Pop. Hard and sour on the outside. Soft and sweet on the inside. Take getting dumped in a relationship for instance. Facing life alone can be tough for many people. Yet, there are behind-the-scenes benefits to every predicament! There's even a sweet treat hidden within the experience of losing a lover.
You can find the "pop"-the sweetness-inside your tart tootsie roll by looking behind the surface appearance of your situation. Ask yourself some probing questions: "What's been the beneficial effect of my predicament?" "What did I learn that helped me become a better person?" and "What good eventually came out of the situation?"
By focusing on how the experience served you, you can discover how the loss of a relationship can restore your trust in life. Or how losing your job or health can propel you closer to your dreams!
Let's check out some real-life lemons. Here are some examples of the unseen rewards of losing your relationship, job and health. And how the sour aftertaste can become sweet!
Benefits of Being Dumped
I was secure in my second marriage. Then, after 15 years, my husband suddenly abandoned me to marry an older woman. You heard right-an older woman! Go figure!
For years following the divorce, my feelings of hurt and anger were compounded by a sense of failure and humiliation. A decade later, I still feel the sting of betrayal. But now I'm armed with the outlook that every experience serves me. "So," I ponder, "what could possibly be the hidden value of getting dumped?"
While searching for the benefits, I unearth my involvement in the betrayal. The more honest I am, the more I uncover the truth: I'm the cause of my husband leaving me!
I Knew at the Altar!
I realize now that the betrayal began at the church altar. As my fianc�e slipped the ring on my finger, I knew that we weren't meant to be married to each other. I betrayed my own intuition by agreeing to be his wife. The undeniable fact is that I'm the one who abandoned me, not my spouse.
Why didn't I listen to my inner knowing? I realize now that I was afraid to be alone. To avoid loneliness, I jumped into matrimony.
These startling realizations release emotions that have haunted me for years. As more liberating insights pour in, the sour feelings begin to lift. I actually start to appreciate my ex-husband! He had the courage to tell himself and me the straight dope-that our relationship was dead.
Long-term Rewards
Having these fresh insights gives me renewed strength and curiosity to keep asking questions. What could possibly be the long-term benefits of being forced to live on my own? How has it served me to have to take care of myself? What good has come from this experience?
Slowly I begin to spot my good fortune of being left in the lurch:
When you live alone, you stop being controlled by another person's actions and reclaim the freedom to pursue your personal passions. You create a more personally meaningful lifestyle. And being alone, you're much more available to people and activities that support you in creating your unique dreams.
Benefits of Losing Your Job
"We won't be needing your services any longer." When I heard these words come out of my employer's mouth, I was floored. But I shouldn't have been.
Out of desperation, I'd taken employment to pay my bills. Then every day for months, I silently complained to myself about the work I was doing. I constantly struggled to make myself fit into an occupation that didn't suit me.
The value of losing the job was actually very obvious.
When you look under the surface appearance of being let go, you may find, in actuality, that you gave yourself "the boot." On a deeper level of awareness, you wanted out of the job. With the aid of hindsight, you see that you unconsciously managed to get yourself fired because it was time for you to move on to the next stage of your self-expression.
Benefits of Losing Your Health
The excruciating sciatica pain running through my leg and back was forcing me to lie motionless in bed for days. Suspecting that being laid up is serving me in some way, I look for the value in being sick. I discover that the affliction is a "wake up!" call. The pain is alerting me to the fact that I'm not supporting and nurturing myself by the way I'm living my life.
I realize that:
The value of the sciatica was that it gave me the opportunity to check in with my spirit to see where I was off track in my life. When I got my life back on course, I re-established my health and vitality.
Losing your health forces you to take a long, deep look at your life. Being ill immobilizes you to some degree, which gives you time to review the people and activities you're involved with. The message of sickness is almost always that you're engaged with people and activities that aren't intuitively right for you. Life pursuits that are out of harmony with your true interests and values pull your body out of balance. Eventually, the imbalance makes you ill. You'll find that when you take action to bring yourself back into alignment with your spirit, your health improves.
Where's Your "Pop"?
Wouldn't you like to transform hurt into gain? You can! A sweet core lies under the surface appearance of any sour experience. By realizing the benefits of any situation, you can find the "pop" inside your lemon tootsie roll.
About The Author
As a personal life coach and vision quest guide, Sulana Stone assists people to discover and express their life purpose through private sessions and workshops. Find out how to get more love in life, a more fulfilling job, or find a purpose beyond the mundane with a FREE Prosperity Ezine and FREE Empowerment Tape at www.SedonaVisionQuest.com. Contact her at sulanastone@yahoo.com or 602.861.2631 for free coaching.
![]() |
|
![]() |
|
![]() |
|
![]() |
Is there any necessary connection between our actions and the... Read More
This is one of my all time favourite problem solving... Read More
As moms we all tend to get the blues, we... Read More
Sometimes change is pleasant. A child is born. A new... Read More
How do we smile at each other? Is there a... Read More
"When we do something we love, again and again, our... Read More
To maintain an unchangeable sweetness of disposition, to think only... Read More
A friend once said to me, "There is no meaning... Read More
Falling In Love with LifeThere is no feeling in the... Read More
When we choose to move beyond the boundaries of the... Read More
So you're stuck in a rut, bored with how your... Read More
When you're in love your eyes and your face light... Read More
Everyone I've ever met considers happiness to be desirable. There... Read More
Six months ago you had trouble finding your keys and... Read More
Happiness comes to a person when it is caused by... Read More
You can be as happy as you want whenever you... Read More
I have to be honest. I made the woman cashier... Read More
In the United States, the pursuit of happiness is a... Read More
Placing your attention, energy and focus on the negative aspects... Read More
Sometimes life experiences can be like a lemon-flavored Tootsie Roll... Read More
Do you know what all happy and healthy marriages have... Read More
You have a purpose in life. You have a unique... Read More
1. DRUNK!At the age of sixteen I was invited out... Read More
Want to be happier?Edward W. Smith, motivational speaker, author and... Read More
Where does happiness fit on a scale of 1 to... Read More
To begin feeling that first spark of self-confidence within you,... Read More
Yes, this is correct. Sunny Days are here to stay,... Read More
Fortunate, indeed, is the man who takes exactly the right... Read More
Happiness. The pursuit of so many. In fact, we are... Read More
Everyone has issues with self esteem. It's no wonder then... Read More
This question and answer article was done by Gizelle River,... Read More
So many people overwork themselves literary in the quest for... Read More
How would you like to have at least an extra... Read More
In pursuit of happiness, what will we do as women?... Read More
1. DRUNK!At the age of sixteen I was invited out... Read More
If one thing is for certain, each of us will... Read More
I like to be around positive people, people who tend... Read More
The most beautiful flowers, in conjunction with their design and... Read More
The decisions we make everyday have a big impact on... Read More
Placing your attention, energy and focus on the negative aspects... Read More
Many of my clients are working harder than smarter. This... Read More
I just read an installment from another self-improvement course that... Read More
My journey to becoming a therapist began with a desire... Read More
Right off the top: What is the difference between dating... Read More
"When we do something we love, again and again, our... Read More
Of all the people who know me, no one would... Read More
If you're an employer or a manager then work place... Read More
As a teenager growing up reading 'Blue Jeans' and 'Jackie',... Read More
What do you think about happiness? A philosophical approach to... Read More
Being raised in a household without a mother or a... Read More
Did you know that there are gifts that will multiply... Read More
Our sense of smell elicits strong emotional reactions and triggers... Read More
What if I told you that you have the ability... Read More
1. Mend a quarrel Seek out a forgotten friend and... Read More
Imagine for a moment you have been given a task.... Read More
Passion Love Action You! Playing with your own divinity, spirit,... Read More
Humans are liable to experience a variety of afflictions, but... Read More
Laughter, humor, a lighthearted sense of being - all of... Read More
Ever notice how some people just seem to be able... Read More
We all have them. It has many faces. We carry... Read More
"When you live the life you were meant to live,... Read More
Sometimes we are so occupied with our daily routine in... Read More
"Circumstances are the rulers of the weak; they are but... Read More
Aromatics which include essential oils, perfume, centred candles and incense,... Read More
Can money buy happiness? It's easy to say no, and... Read More
Here's a multiple choice question for you. Who is more... Read More
Finding Happiness |