How To Heal Your Heart

We all experience severe heart break at some time in our lives. For many it happens in childhood or adolescence, the time when we are most vulnerable. A cold mother, an absent father, being different in any way from our peers and ostracized for it - these are some of the reasons for the early feeling that something is wrong, inadequate and utterly disappointing about us. For others, it happens later, when a spouse betrays our love and trust, a child is hurt, or our dream of making it big in the world is shattered.

It happens -sooner or later- to everybody, yet strangely enough, we tend to believe that other people have heaps of money, great careers, excellent health, and are blessed with devoted spouses and perfect children. Even if common sense tells us that this isn't true, we behave as if it were. We hide behind our painted faces and empty phrases, as if our wounded heart was a rare, shameful thing that had to be hidden at all costs. Even if we are the light of every party, our real self never shows up. We withdraw and disconnect while telling pretty lies in appearance, word and deed. Thus our hearts shrink and harden, and we live lonesome, inauthentic lives deep within the fortress we have built from pride and fear.

From this point on, two things can happen: either we become depressed or cynical enough to believe that staying in this barren place and turning into dust is our only option, or we listen to the cries of our exiled hearts and become seekers. If you belonged to the first group, you would not be reading this book. So let's start the search for our true selves. In the following imaginative exercise, you will begin to restore the lost connection to your heart. You may feel some resistance reading these words. Won't this lead to an emotional breakdown, or to an eruption of pain and anger? It depends on your intention.

If you want to explore your childhood or other severe emotional trauma, there are medical and psychological professionals who are trained to guide you through that sensitive process.

What we want to achieve here is to find and free our spiritual hearts. There is the heart, and there is the true heart. There is our "pink" heart, and there is our "golden" heart. There is our low heart, and there is our high heart.

Qualities of the low heart: Passion, Extremes, Volatility, Attachment, Emotion.

Qualities of the high heart: Compassion, Balance, Patience, Unity, Spirit, Soul.

Again, our intention is to connect to the high, the spiritual heart. This may happen instantly, at the first try. If it does, it is a profound, awe-inspiring experience, and you will recognize the level of truth instantly. You will realize that there is, behind your physically sick or emotionally broken heart, a heart that is completely whole and strong and wise. However, establishing this pathway could be a much longer process. You might connect to "pieces" of your heart at a time. Perhaps you will first experience an acute awareness of your heart's imprisonment, or your inner space may remain silent for a while. Take it easy. Whatever happens is just the right thing to happen for you at this point.

EXERCISE: LISTEN TO YOUR HEART

Sit or lie down comfortably, making sure you will not be disturbed. Close your eyes. Breathe. Relax. If relaxation does not come easily to you, visualize a thick, golden liquid pooling in your head. Slowly, slowly, like molasses, it flows down into your whole body, making it slack and heavy.

When you feel relaxed, shift your attention to your chest. Imagine breathing through your chest. In-out. In-out. In-out. Do this as long as you want to. When you are ready, focus your attention gently on your heart.

Your high heart, your true heart, your spiritual heart.

Now, and possibly for the first time, greet your true heart. Express your gratitude for its continuous, life giving service, its protection and guidance.

When you have established a connection, you might want to ask questions. Then be quiet and listen.

Listen to the voice of your heart. This voice might express itself in words, in feelings, in images, in sounds, or just as a "knowing". Learning to recognize the unique voice of your heart may take time, so relax if you can't "get it right" at first.

About The Author

Carna Zacharias was born in Germany, where more than ten books written by her have been published: novels, young-adult books, and non-fiction. In addition she worked as a literary critic at a daily newspaper, as a book editor, and for public television. After studying literature and philosophy at the university, she has been exploring Jungian psychology, mythology, fairy tales, Shamanism and other spiritual topics for years.

CarnaZM@msn.com

---

Liberation

It is one thing to be free; it is quite... Read More

What is an Appropriate Sympathy Gift?

When a friend or loved one is grieving, it is... Read More

Who has the Worst Pain

During the 28 years I have been interacting with bereaved... Read More

Silent Tears - from a Norwegian Hospital

Silent tears hit hospital-white sheets. The young Pakistani mother holds... Read More

Death Poem

During the two years of my husband's terminal illness, death... Read More

Pope John Paul II

WHAT I LEARNED FROM POPE JOHN PAUL II ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I am... Read More

Do You Know Someone Whos Dying?

Too many people are dying alone?The dying are one of... Read More

Suicide in the Church, Part 3

Suicide strikes...AGAIN!This may wind up being the most important article... Read More

The Look of Grief

Never, since man has walked upright, have people all over... Read More

Beyond A Mothers Nightmare To Radical Forgiveness

It was a moment I will never forget.On February 22,... Read More

New Tears [about Grievng--with commentary]

New Tears [about Grieving]If it rains or shinesLittle does it... Read More

A Critical Assessment of Euthanasia

The question of whether, say, a man should have the... Read More

The Lesson of a Mothers Death

Dedicated to my mother, FlorenceNovember 11, 1920 ? May 25,... Read More

If Ever It Is Me

With my father, his brother and their father having had... Read More

Mexico: Death in Mexico

Death: No thank you. Dying: Gives me a panic attack.... Read More

Dying On the Inside: A Childs Grief

The impatient tooting of a car horn startled us into... Read More

Learning to Live Again

Overcoming death and beginning once again to live is the... Read More

Dealing With Grief and Loss - How to Mend a Broken Heart

What is it about Grief & Loss that upsets us... Read More

Whens Sarah Coming Home? Helping Your Child Understand Death

For most children, their first experience with grief comes with... Read More

Men and Grief

Men grieve differently from women. Our cultural roles make it... Read More

Terrorism Worries: 10 Ways to Turn Fear into Hope

September 11th changed America and chances are it changed you.... Read More

Understanding Grief and Loss in Times of War and Disaster

There are many different kinds of losses we can experience... Read More

Grief & Loss - Healing Your Broken Heart

What is it about Grief & Loss that upsets us... Read More

How My Four Your Old Son Reacted To The Death Of His Great Nanny Biscuits

My nan was called Margaret and lived until the age... Read More

Trial by Fire - 9 Tips for Grieving Couples

You will often hear that grief and loss bring couples... Read More

Euthanasia: How Will I Know When its Time?

Pippin needed assistance from his owner to get to his... Read More

And You Always Will

I opened the dishtowel drawer for about the sixth time,... Read More

Grief Support: The Dos

Helpers often ask questions such as: "What should I do?... Read More

Anticipatory Grief and Ongoing Sadness for Caregivers

In 1969, Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross published her famous book; On... Read More

Lessons We Learned From Terri Schiavo

Let's talk about Terry Schiavo, since her death illustrated for... Read More

Suicide - An Eternal Pain

Suicide is the one form of death that has quite... Read More

Loss Involves Change - The Transformative Power of Loss and Change

There are many experiences in life, which remind us that... Read More

Coping with Grief - Its Called Living Through It

"Dad, I tried to wake Nana, I think she's dead."... Read More