Over time I have come to realize that the three most important subjects in the world to man are sex, property and religion. By the first we create life, by the second we maintain life and by the third we hope to continue life in the world to come. But I have also come to realize that it is not our sex, our interests swarm about our own egos, self-worth or self-esteem.
Someone said "No one can fall in love if he is even partially satisfied with what he has or who he is. The experience of falling in love originates in an extreme depression, an inability to find something that has value in everyday life. The 'symptom' of the predisposition to fall in love is not the conscious desire to do so or the intense desire to enrich our lives, it is the profound sense of being worthless and of having nothing that is valuable and the shame of not having it."
Self-esteem therefore is a powerful human need without which we will be vulnerable to various situations ranging from failure in school to failure in relationships. Young people, since they are profoundly uncertain, unsure of there worth and often ashamed of themselves frequently full in love.
They seek those values they cannot find in themselves. They seek honesty, they seek trust, they seek truth, and they seek courage, charm, charisma, confidence, carriage and character in other people. They build their world around the person in whom they find the values they seek. This one person controls their emotional, social and sometimes spiritual lives. They build their emotional lives around the behaviour of others, empowering the weaknesses of other people to control them. This is the height of vulnerability in people.
The reality is that over time this individual we build our world around discovers our dependability no matter how clever we try to hide it and then they use it to oppress us. They know we do not posses the values they do and so we are not their kind of person. In a question of time when they meet someone with their values they will move on. The truth is like terms attract like terms.
It is quite instructive to say that if we can develop ourselves, our heart, our habits and our character to such a level where we posses the very value we are looking for in others we will be better off. We would love from a vantage position of strength and not weakness, we would become a miracle out of darkness instead of a package of misery in motion, we would love ourselves the more and others who we meet will respect us in return.
To achieve this growth in ourselves we must limit contact with those who always pull us down, those who would only see the bad in us and never acknowledge the good, those who would not help us to be better, those who do not posses the values we seek to develop in ourselves because as a stream always partakes of the property of the soil through which it runs, so the principles and habits of youth invariably becomes tinctured with the character of the company in which they mingle.
You must make out a list of your best qualities with the determination of improving them. These qualities will form the foundation of your strength upon which you will build new values and habits. You must also identify the values you are moving towards and those you are moving away from. Remember the chains of habit are always too weak to be felt until they become too strong to be broken. So work at breaking free of every habit that will take you far away from your ultimate goal.
Finally, in the process of evolving new principles, character and habits do not leave anything to chance. Chances are that if you keep working on your thoughts, actions, habits, character and principles you will wake up one fine morning to discover that you are one of the best in your generation.
The values you admire and seek in others can be developed in you if and only if you choose to work at developing them. Remember what the mind can conceive and believe the mind can achieve.
![]() |
|
![]() |
|
![]() |
|
![]() |
Have you seen those ads that promise to make thousands... Read More
So, a New Year has snuck up on you again... Read More
Last year, I attended a seminar where the attendees were... Read More
A Big Audacious Goal (BAG) is a clear and compelling... Read More
There have been so many times in my life where... Read More
Surprisingly few people regularly make lists of their goals and... Read More
This week's article assumes that you have chosen a goal,... Read More
It seems as though so many people are seeking more,... Read More
"To accomplish great things we must not only act, but... Read More
Have you ever put all your eggs in one basket?... Read More
One of the things most critical to home business success... Read More
Interestingly, the word vision can be interchangeable with the word... Read More
Much has been written about writing down goals and regularly... Read More
Whether we like to admit it or not, other people's... Read More
What goals do you have for your life? If you... Read More
What are your dreams?Are you in a place in your... Read More
Like the song by Linda Ronstadt, "a dream is a... Read More
"Excellence is never an accident; it is always the result... Read More
NOTE: This article is one of the component parts of... Read More
Have you ever heard the old saying If you want... Read More
Treasure Map Your Success for 2005Treasure-mapping is the process of... Read More
The responsibility of working hard, planning and living a successful... Read More
Human beings are goal-seeking creatures. We are impatient and try,... Read More
The Hasidic master, Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach taught that on Passover... Read More
"Man is a goal-seeking animal. His life only has meaning... Read More
If you have always been procrastinating on how to get... Read More
Do you ever daydream about going on a great vacation?... Read More
It is important to have goals because they are good... Read More
In this short article I'd like to discuss a certain... Read More
Decide what you want, decide what you are willing to... Read More
I cannot stress the importance of setting goals enough. Goals... Read More
Focus is the single most important factor that will determine... Read More
You may or may not have a set of written... Read More
When deciding to write this article, I decided that I... Read More
Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes... Read More
In this article you will learn the most powerful knowledge... Read More
One of the things most critical to home business success... Read More
This week's article assumes that you have chosen a goal,... Read More
In Part 1 I started the discussion on what to... Read More
1. Stop seeking approval from people.You don't need anyone's permission... Read More
According to Merriam-Webster's dictionary "apathy is defined as the following:... Read More
Have you ever started a new year with a New... Read More
Many people envy academics who take sabbaticals. What they don't... Read More
Why are there so much stress and unhappiness in the... Read More
Set your GOALS - write them down! Most of us... Read More
I cannot stress the importance of setting goals enough. Goals... Read More
The Focus Wheel was first described by Abraham-Hicks as a... Read More
(excerpted from the Jim Rohn One-Year Success Plan)Jim Rohn's Second... Read More
One of the biggest reasons that many people have trouble... Read More
As 2005 approaches, many of us are thinking about change.... Read More
Which of the following changes to your life do you... Read More
I wonder if anyone really reads long stuff from Ezines... Read More
For the past several weeks, I have not been sleeping... Read More
Whatever you want in life, you have far more chance... Read More
Fortune will flow into your hands like a river flow... Read More
What would you like to achieve in your lifetime?Author Basil... Read More
Should goals take a long time?Yes and No.Yes, goals should... Read More
Pull Quote: "the secret to living a "dream come true"... Read More
Setting goals is wonderful; it confirms that we've taken those... Read More
If the 90s British pop sensation 'the Spice Girls' ever... Read More
"What would you like to accomplish in the next 90... Read More
It is important to have goals because they are good... Read More
Welcome to Weekly Wisdoms. Last week I found a new... Read More
1) Write them down! Statistics show people who write down... Read More
Does personal goal setting work? Many people want things, situations... Read More
Each year we start the year thinking about our goals,... Read More
Goal Setting |